by John Walters

“I think confidence is silent, and insecurities are loud”

–Sen. John Kennedy (R), Louisiana, on Trump’s proposed military parade

Starting Five

1. Weave Only Just Begun*

*On second thought, the judges prefer “Trump Comes Unglued”

This is why you never leave the White House without your MAGA cap. Sure, it is juvenile and crass to mock someone’s physical features, particularly those of a 71 year-old man. But then you remember that Donald Trump has a Ph.D. in schoolyard bullying (“Little Marco,” “Pocahontas,” etc.) and you think that turnabout is fair play. When they go low, we go, “Hey, dude, where’s your hair?”


2. “Oh, Robbbbbb!”

Does it elicit more than even a yawn that White House Staff Secretary Rob Porter is accused by both of his ex-wives of physical and mental abuse, that he denies the charges, that the White House spends the first half of the day attempting to preserve his job until it realizes only worse news will be released, so then his current squeeze Hope Hicks, who also works in the White House, helps him draft a letter of resignation?

Oh, by the way, he’s totes innocent. It’s all the left-wing media’s fault (so why is he resigning?). And how come Donald remains impervious to sexual assault allegations, even though there have literally been ten times as many directed his way and aren’t you tired of reading about this?

3. The Kings of Queens

Ponds, 2, has been lighting it up of late

Has this ever happened before? In a five-day span St. John’s exorcises an 11-game losing streak by first taking down the nation’s most talented team, Duke, 81-77, and then knocking off its top-ranked program, Villanova, 79-75. The Johnnies’ hero? Shamorie Ponds, who drained 33 on Saturday and 26 last night.

Chris Mullin‘s Queens squad is now 12-13, but shouldn’t there be room in a 68-team field for a team with two of the nation’s most impressive W’s this winter?

4. Q-Trip!

84 year-old music impresario Quincy Jones tosses off his give-a-f*** cloak and gives a hilarious and candid interview to Vulture in which he claims to have 22 girlfriends across the globe, that Chicago mobster Sam Giancana killed JFK, that the young Beatles were horrible musicians, particularly Ringo (everyone already knew this) and that Marlon Brando was both extremely charming and extremely horny. Q says the erstwhile Stanley Kowalski/Don Corleone had relations with, among others, Richard Pryor, James Baldwin and Marvin Gaye, and that he’d “(bleep) a mailbox.”

Giancana, Sinatra. Horse head not pictured.

But do read the entire interview. We loved how Quincy would ask the interviewer, David Marchese, questions, such as “What’s your sign?” or “Where you from?” This interview is every reporter’s dream.

5. Release The Mama


The highlight of National Signing Day: four-star wide receiver Jacob Copeland commits to Florida as his mama, clad in an Alabama sweatshirt and a Tennessee ball cap, is seated next to him. And then she storms off.

Mama did return a few minutes later and give her baby a hug.


Not-Breaking News: The staff of MH LOVES animals. Here’s just another reason why:



Great night for late-night visits, as former SNL writers’ room staffers Seth Meyers and John Mulaney converse….

….and former Daily Show second-bananas Stephen Colbert and John Oliver dialogue it back and forth….

Mulaney and Oliver are the two funniest comedians we’ve got going now in a world where Louis C.K. no longer exists.


Kelsey Grammer pays tribute to his TV dad, John Mahoney:



Certainly not the first time The Worst Wing has marinated in hypocrisy, and it won’ the the last. I actually had a Deplorable admonish me for being an elitist yesterday, thinking that the reason I RT’ed it was to mock Melania’s parents’ lack of education. This is The Great Big Dumb we are dealing with…


Music 101

Conquer Me

Would it shock you to learn that the members of Blues Traveler hail from Princeton, N.J. ? They would hit it big with their 1994 album, Four, but this gem off the 1993 record Save His Soul set the stage for all that was to follow. John Popper on lead vocals.

Remote Patrol

Olympics Opening Ceremony Figure Skating, Freestyle Skiing

8 p.m. NBC

Apparently, the Opening Ceremony is tomorrow night, AFTER this….

2 thoughts on “IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

  1. There are some Olympic preliminary competitions & “training runs” going on now (started last night our time). I watched the men’s Downhill training runs last night on NBCSN. sigh. I’ve watched 2 competitions from that venue on TV the past 2 years (one men’s, one women’s) & it is an UGLY venue. The courses themselves look fine but the surrounding mts look DREARY & drab. I’d been hoping that somehow, SOMEway the “view” would change by the Olympics, but no. In fact, I can’t remember an uglier alpine venue from any other Winter Olympics but maybe I just don’t remember all the ones I’ve seen since 1968 (my 1st, from Grenoble, France – I have only 3 distinct memories (I was YOUNG!) – the bobsled which my older sister & I & millions of other American kids then tried all winter to emulate, this French guy (Jean Claude Killy) winning ALL 3 men’s ski races- they had only 3 then, & of course, America’s sweetheart, Peggy Fleming, who was the reason I 1st fell in love with Figure Skating.)

    Do you still own TWTR? At least I thought you owned some. Well, for about an hour this morning, it was a double for me. Hopefully, things will only get better from here but I still doubt it will be my next NVDA. 🙂

    And I almost, ALMOST want that pathetic “military parade” to happen because you know, you just KNOW the Fearful Leader wants desperately to dress up in a gaudy fake military outfit! Of course, since DC & the surrounding areas in MD & northern VA all HATE HIS GUTS, he may just be trying to remind us all that “HE” is protected here.

  2. I am not one for millennial-bashing, but this NYT article re millennial’s trying to weather this slight downturn in the stock market is too filled with unintentional comedy to ignore:

    To wit:
    “Mr. Stillman, who produces and hosts digital videos in Los Angeles, said he taught himself about investing by conducting online research and watching YouTube tutorials.”

    “’I feel like my formal education did not educate me at all for investing or planning for my future,’ said Mr. Stillman, who has a bachelor’s degree in anthropology from the University of Rochester.”

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