Starting Five 

As fellow readers are well aware, John is out of the office today. So, guess what? You are left with a 19-year-old college kid. Ha! You lose. Anyhow, @okerland filled in yesterday, meaning Medium Happy will continue its non-holiday weekday streak of providing you the distinguished IAH! post. Even Cal Ripken Jr. could appreciate that.

Any disgruntled fans can reach me at @J_Anstey. Because I already like this so much, any gruntled fans can also reach me at the same feed. Look, we all win on this one.

Without further ado, let’s get down to business.

Is that Craig Sager in the neon?

1. The Melee of Orem

The Utah State Valley Wolverines defeated the New Mexico State Aggies in OT, 66-61, giving the Wolverines a 1-game lead in the Western Athletic Conference. It was what happened after the final buzzer, however, that will grab the attention of sports fans across the country. Seconds after the game, New Mexico State guard K.C. Ross-Miller, in what seems like a deliberate manner, hurled the basketball – hitting Utah Valley’s Holton Hunsaker, who happens to be the coach’s son. Simultaneous with the provocative actions of Miller, Utah Valley’s students started rushing the court — creating a prime condition for chaos.

The altercation only lasted roughly 30-seconds, but it was the speed at which things developed that is so intriguing. Discussion will continue about the safety hazards that are created by students rushing the court, and this incident will not help matters. It is shame, considering the excitement that rushing the court creates for students. As commonly unveiled, the actions of a few will inhibit the actions of all.

2. Philly Troubles

At least someone is having a good time…

The Philadelphia 76ers, who are a pedestrian 15-43, have lost 12 straight; the road ahead, moreover, does not get any sunnier in Philly.

In fact, let’s observe the numbers:

• Since beating the Celtics, 95-94, on January 29, the Sixers have lost 12 straight by an average of 19.5 points. Remember, this is the NBA, not your standard Junior High game down the street.
• Eight of the twelve teams that defeated Philadelphia were, and currently still are, under .500 for the season. Their last two opponents – Milwaukee and Orlando – have a combined 29 wins. Indiana has 44 wins thus far. A margin that speaks for itself.

Compounded by the fact that the Sixers traded away both Evan Turner and Spencer Hawes, their two best players, we can only expect a continued train wreck in Philly. Luckily for them, this year’s draft is loaded with stars, albeit still teenagers.

Doug McDermott, on the other hand, will luckily avoid Philly. Early birthday present, I suppose.

3. O’Reilly. Oh, Really?

Did you think I was going to actually post a picture of O’Reilly?

Bill O’Reilly opened his mouth — again. This time, Mr. Attention Seeker sought out weaknesses in women. Joined by Kirsten Powers and Kate Obenshain, O’Reilly ostensibly shuttered with amazement by the guests’ refusal to admit a fault in women, as their roles relate to a president’s duty. The interview starts awkwardly, after O’Reilly tells Powers “I know you’ve probably thought about this [the idea that women have innate weaknesses].”

Sure, Bill’s a man of many words. However, by seeking out weaknesses in females, O’Reilly just falsifies himself even more. Do some women have weaknesses? Yes. Does that mean all women have the same weakness? Hell no. We’re human, Bill. Imperfection is the norm, get use to it.

Oh, and if you really want to see a Journalism 101 mistake by the purported genius, check the preceding link (around 2:30). Contradicting yourself is one thing. Contradicting yourself literally seconds after saying something is, well,  inexcusable.

4. 74 Years and Counting

Unfortunately, the Knicks garner more than one camera at MSG.

74 years ago today, the first collegiate basketball game was televised on NBC. That game, between Fordham and Pittsburgh at the Madison Square Garden, was recorded with only one camera. Pittsburgh defeated Fordham, 57-37, and the Panthers were coached by legendary coach Henry “Doc” Carlson. While at Pittsburgh, Carlson went 367-248, winning two Helms Athletic Foundation championships, one in 1928 and the other in 1930. When the third NCAA Tournament was held in 1941, Carlson led his Panther team to the Final Four, losing to eventual champion Wisconsin. Eight teams competed in that NCAA Tournament, not 120 68.

Carlson, moreover, has since been inducted into the Helms Athletic Foundation Hall of Fame (1949), the Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame (1959), and the National Collegiate Basketball Hall of Fame (2006). The latter two, Carlson was inducted during the respective Hall’s inaugural year.

 5. To Tenure or Not to Tenure

Scott Winter

I told you I was in college, not which college I was in. Well, I am a student at the University of Nebraska – Lincoln. Born and breed. And, as a side note to this post, I must say I am not a member of the University’s College of Journalism and Mass Communications program, nor am I employed by the student run newspaper, the Daily Nebraskan. No page view benefits for me.

Apart from that, this development is quite interesting. Co-authored by UNL students Gabrielle Lazaro and Melissa Allen, this story depicts the dissenting views of a university and their students, the soul of the university. I understand the benefits that a professor has when tenured, and I understand the slight (really, it can only be slight, considering Scott Winter has taught there for nine years) risk for the university that goes along with tenuring a professor. However, when you have numerous students crediting their success to a specific professor, one must think that professor is influential.

As the University of Nebraska – Lincoln is concerned, their future is on the line here. It is not a die or live situation, but it is a precedence setting decision that will affect it in the future. The fact is, the University of Nebraska – Lincoln is statistically worse than other Big Ten institutions regarding academics. Why, then, push out one of your most influential professors that, even more telling, helps students bring home awards?

I came here to be a part of an up-and-coming university, not a static movement. I could have gone elsewhere, but didn’t. It is time to keep Mr. Winter before he leaves. Leaves to, potentially, another Big Ten institution.

Remote Patrol

No. 4 Syracuse at No. 12 Virginia

(Saturday) ESPN 4 p.m.

It’s the closest you’ll get to a Steel Curtain this year in college basketball.

After Saturday night’s game, the winner of the Orange and Cavaliers will have the key to the ACC regular season championship in their possession. The Cavaliers have won 12 straight, and the Orange have lost 2 of their last 3. Even more impressive, the Cavaliers boast one of the best, if not the best, defenses in the country, only giving up 55.3 points per game. We’ll put Jim Boeheim’s aggression on hold as we enjoy college basketball at its finest.

STARTING FIVE

1. Arizona Iced Bill

In a decision that took longer than it should have Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer (not to be confused with former SNL actor Jim Breuer) vetoed SB 1602, which would have allowed businesses to deny service to gay and lesbian customers. Why Brewer waited so long to veto the bill we will never know, but considering a few days ago she said she had until Friday night to make a decision she must have felt the pressure to do something now. Aside from a few state congress members (note, not federal congress members) who realized after the fact what they passed was wrong, this was a business decision. Arizona has sun, deserts and golf plus Spring Training. the last thing MLB needs is protests during spring training. In addition, Arizona is hosting this little thing called the Super Bowl next January. Brewer knew passing that law meant no Super Bowl, an event that brings millions in revenue and exposure. Screw business leaders out of money and her term as Governor could be short lived.

My hope is that Michael Sam is named MVP of next year’s Super Bowl. (Before you laugh, Malcolm Smith, this year’s MVP, was a 7th round pick in 2011; and a 6th round pick by the name of Tom Brady has a won a few of them too)

The anarchist in me (maybe that’s not the right term) would have wished the bill passed. Not because I agree with it, but to see the NFL scramble to find another location in a year. Considering the amount of angst they took for playing a SB game in NY/NJ, I’m sure the media would have had a field day.

Lastly, one of the star player’s of Phoenix’s WNBA team is openly gay as is some of the fan base. Would have been interesting had the bill passed and someone with deeply religious ties didn’t want her to play.

2. Book Smarts never equate to Survivor Smarts

Last night began season 1 million of Survivor. As a loyal fan, I’ve watched almost every season. Sometimes, we’ll start and never finish because the season is a dud or we get so backlogged, etc. For some the attraction is the location of the show (note: due to budget cuts, Survivor basically uses the same island chain over and over again), but for me it’s the game play (or lack thereof). This season features Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty. It was fitting that the hidden immunity idol was in the water so CBS could make the girl from the beauty team strip down within the first 30 minutes. (Also, when she said she was from Silicon Valley, I wasn’t sure if she meant Bay Area or where she got her breasts – hey-o).

As I said, I’m a gameplay person and wouldn’t you know it, the Brains crew out thunk itself at both tribal councils. After falling twice on the part of the challenges they should have excelled at – the puzzles, they voted off the two people who could have them avoid future tribal councils. First was the president of the Miami Marlins (been a stellar year for them) who was already thinking way too far ahead in the game and the poker player who could have been on the beauties team. Now they are left with 5 basically unathletic people including one who sucks at puzzles. Looks like Probst and Co may have to change the game up earlier than expected.

My main issue with people on Survivor is too many vote of the annoying person early on rather than getting rid of the weak link. Often the weak link makes it to the merge, hides in the background and then wins because he/she overcame the odds. If you don’t win Tribal Council, you don’t have the chance to stay in the game longer. The goal should be to get the merge, then exact your plan.

3. The Magic of Disney

With a toddler running my household (my wife won’t admit it but my kid knows to flash a smile and suddenly he’s up to his eyeballs in Doritos), my television stays on Disney or Disney Junior every morning.  What amazes me is not the power that Disney has over kids or that Mickey Mouse is still a dominant force, but the creativity at Disney HQ.

– Nickleodeon comes out with Dora, Disney steals the format and puts Mickey as the lead character.
– How do you make Peter Pan relevant? come up with 3 kids who battle Captain Hook on Neverland island. (I could write a whole blog post on Jake, but I don’t know if John will ever let me come back)
– Toy Story for girls? Doc McStuffins
– need another princess who ties into the other ones? create Sophia, the once poor citizen whose mom caught the King’s eye and suddenly got an upgrade in life. Her amulet allows her to talk with animals and other princesses. (Also for $25 you can buy the amulet and pretend to talk to the same things)

Anyway, in the last year Disney has launched 4 new shows: Sophia, Henry Hugglemonster, Ella the Elephant and Sheriff Callie. And as far as I can tell the other shows aren’t going anywhere. And kids love them. This also doesn’t include the shorts that go in between shows so that you have no excuse to change the channel to check up on a game or convince your kid the show is over. (Disney also rarely runs commercials so your kid is hooked for 23 minutes at a time)

Now the way to see if the show is a hit is once the stuffed animals, toys, etc. hit the shelf.

I just want to sit in a Disney Jr. planning meeting during pitch week to figure out how they come up with hit after hit after hit.

My one complaint: Disney needs to give me a heads up when they change the schedule. I need to be prepared when Mickey will air at 8 instead of 7:30 am, so I know when to use Netflix or the DVR. Hell hath no fury like a 3 year old who can’t watch Mickey.

4. Cinderellas and the Ball

In roughly a week, conference tournaments from across the country begin which is the appetizer for the Big Dance. 31 teams get automatic bids and roughly 10-12 will hear that they don’t deserve to make it because their conference is terrible. As someone whose worked at a school where the conference tournament was a big deal, I beg to differ.  I’ve campaigned for years that teams that win the autobid should get the right to play in the first round (or second round or round of 64).

As VCU, Wichita State and FIU have shown, mid major conferences don’t deserve the shaft and have proven to belong. They work all year to win their conference only to be told, “technically you’re in, but not really” Imagine being the nerdy kid (I don’t have to imagine that hard) and all year working up the courage to ask out the hot girl to go to prom. She says yes but you find out she meant the pre-prom because the guy with average looks and grades but wealthier family is taking her to prom.

When you watch kids from Vermont, Southern, etc jump around and celebrate next week, remember this is their “One Shining Moment”

4. #FaceofMLB

For roughly 3 weeks, MLB has been running a FaceofMLB contest via twitter.  All 30 teams picked a player and he went head-to-head against another player. David Wright vs. Eric Sogard made the finals.

What jumped out to me was a few things:
1. Jeter, the greatest living ballplayer ever, lost to Jose Bautista
2. somehow a Met made the finals (and he’s taking on an Oakland A)
3. of the 30 teams, only 2.5 African-American players made the cut (what does Jeter count as?) and a majority of white players were among the honorees. I know the number of african american ballplayers has dropped recently but one would figure that the face of MLB would be more diverse. Is it a socioeconomical thing that two white players (one of which is more of a platoon guy) made the finals? (btw, my personal twitter account supports Wright while my work account supports Sogard)
4. The Brewers nominated Ryan Braun. he lost 93% to 7% (I think). Was nominating the devil not an option for the Brewers? seriously you have 25 players on your team and Ryan Braun is whom you nominate?

Thanks for reading, sorry it was too long.  If you liked what you read follow me on twitter @okerland If you didn’t, you’re probably a Michigan or USC alum (actually an alum would be impressive).

someone else is doing this tomorrow, unless John tells me there’s demand. I did have 5 more topics to discuss.

STARTING FIVE

Programming Note: The staff of Medium Happy will be somewhere out of range of the interweb for the remainder of the week, and thus, for the first non-holiday weekday since we began publishing, will not put out an IAH! in the morning. Adjust your medications accordingly. Thank you. And if any of you fan boys want to take a stab at putting out IAH! tomorrow and Friday, contact our global headquarters here. Adios, for now.

Cleanthony Early

1. (Contrived Headline Alert) Win-chita

The Shockers easily defeat Bradley, 69-49, to become the first men’s team ever to go 30-0 in the regular season. The Shockers finished 30-9 last season, losing to eventual national champion Louisville in the Final Four. I’m not sure how many teams have ever won 30 games two years in a row, although I do know John Wooden’s Bruins went 30-0 in consecutive seasons in the early ’70s. Perhaps Bill Walton will tell us more about that this week. Another thing about the Shockers? They’re 20-6 against the spread this season, including last night.

2. Oscar, Oscar, Oscar*

“You mean we’re making a movie based on a U2 song?”

Hollywood releases the names of the 46 presenters for Sunday’s telecast. My favorites: Bill Murray, Charlize, Christopher Waltz, Jim Carrey, Kim Novak (a Hitchcock blonde, Vertigo; Why aren’t there more legendary Hollywood figures like her among the presenters?), and the potent Bell/Biel combo (Kristen/Jessica). Noted omissions: George Clooney, Julia Roberts, Mila Kunis, ScarJo and Will Ferrell. Most curious selection? Jason Sudeikis.

Oh, and here’s a highly subjective list, worst to first, of all the Best Picture winners.

That’s for all you fans of “The Odd Couple” out there.

3. Hirsute of Excellence

Harden is fifth in the league in scoring behind Durant, Carmelo, LeBron and Love (4 guys who spent a combined 3 years in college)

I agree with Bill Simmons: When James Harden is feeling it, he’s a Top 5 player in the NBA. It’s just that he doesn’t have the consistency of a Michael Jordan or a Kobe in his prime. Last night Harden went off for 43 at Sacramento in just 31 minutes — he sat the entire fourth quarter. Harden also went 15 of 15 from the charity stripe. Practice your free throws, kids.

4. When Johnny Met Jon

Manziel excels against double coverage

Ron “Jaws” Jaworski was a pretty good NFL quarterback but he will forever be known as the ESPN talking head given to outlandish statements about quarterbacks (as opposed to Merrill Hoge, who doesn’t limit such bloviating to only QBs). Yesterday Jaws struck again, proclaiming that he would not take former Heisman Trophy winner Johnny Manziel in the first three rounds of the NFL draft (of course he wouldn’t: Jaws doesn’t have a pick). Said Jaws, “I’ve only looked at five games…but he has not done a whole lot, to me.”

Ask Nick Saban about that, Jaws.

So let’s just cut to the chase: Let’s get JFF down at Jon Gruden’s QB camp for some talk about Spider 2 Y Banana, etc. That’ll be fun.

5. Northern California Gold Rush

Hey, hey, my , my…

No, it’s not 1849, it’s 2014, but a couple in the Sierra Nevada region out walking their dog last March discovered 1,400 gold coins, all minted in the 19th century, buried in cans on their property. The cache, or trove (and when do you ever see the word “trove” not preceded by “treasure”?), is worth an estimated $10 million. That pooch better eat filet for the rest of its life.

Meanwhile, I learned a new word: “numismatics.” It refers to the study or collection of currency.

If I were the couple, who are choosing to remain anonymous, I’d use some of the booty to hire Neil Young to perform on my property, simply for irony’s sake.

Reserves

Yarmouk refugee camp, Damascus.

This photo, by The Guardian, from Syria. Meanwhile the hosts of “Good Morning, America” are dressing up as the cast of “American Hustle” in order to promote the Oscars. Because news no longer sells in the TV news business.

****

Host Jimmy Fallon continues to kill it on Tonight –it’s not a talk show, it’s a videotaped adult play-date; stick around for Paul Rudd’s “Don’t Stop Me Now”– while Fred Armisen’s delightfully understated and wacky persona remains the best part of Late Night –but it’s only been two shows. Seth Meyers’ even did a funny send-up of how fans are already decrying how his second show had lost all the edge of his first show. Nicely done.

***

If you have yet to read David Browne’s terrific cover story on Philip Seymour Hoffman in Rolling Stone, I highly recommend (I can’t locate a link). Here’s a link where Cameron Crowe discusses how the late actor got into playing the role of Lester Bangs in Almost Famous.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner 1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P ; 1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B;1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF; 1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B; 1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B; 1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B; 1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B 1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P 1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P 1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul 1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF 1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P 1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

Pie Traynor

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B 1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C 1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B 1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B 1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C 1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF 1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF 1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P 1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF 1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF 1963 Jackie Robinson, 2B; Zack Wheat, LF 1964: Jake Beckley, 1B; Rube Waddell, P 1965: Ralph Kiner, 1B, Lefty Grove, P 1966: Ted Williams, LF; Smoky Joe Wood, P/OF 1967: Roy Campanella, C; Max Carey, OF

1968

Leon Allen “Goose” Goslin, LF; 1921-1938, Washington Senators, 2 others Goslin hit .379 in 1928,  but the batting title wasn’t his that season until his final at-bat. Goose did not want to take the at-bat in the 9th inning, and his manager gave him the option, but his Senator teammates goaded him into it. Quickly falling behind in the count 0-2, Goslin began berating the ump in an effort to get ejected (so the at-bat would not count), but was told by the ump to get back in the box. He stroked a single and earned the crown. A lifetime .316 hitter, Goslin collected 2,735 hits (56th all-time), 500 doubles (57th) and 173 triples (22nd). He also singled in the winning run in the final at-bat of the 1935 World Series.

Goose, he’s your wing man

Walter James Vincent “Rabbit” Maranville, SS; 1912-1935, Boston Braves, 4 others Yes, it helps to have a small creature’s nickname. Rabbit played 23 seasons, the most in the N.L. of anyone until Pete Rose eclipsed the mark in 1986. He accumulated 2,605 lifetime hits and 177 triples, which is 19th all-time. Despite standing just 5’5″, he hit clean-up for the Braves in 1914, the year they won the World Series.

Remote Patrol

California at No. 3 Arizona

ESPN2 9 p.m.

Speaking of Bills and Arizona, how about that wacky proposal to refuse business to gays?

I can only assume the WWL has installed Dave Pasch and Bill Walton to do this game, so get your Big Red Bingo chart ready: The Biosphere, Pyramid of Success, Bob Dylan, Wavy Gravy, possibly Johnny Cash (it’s his birthday, although it’s also the birthday of fun. singer Nate Reuss, who’s an Arizona native, so throw him a bone, Bill), and if we’re lucky, Jan Brewer. Listen as Pasch’s frustration grows: He’s playing the role of David Spade in “Tommy Boy.”

STARTING FIVE

Fred Armisen may be the star of “Late Night with Seth Meyers.”

1. Paging Stephon!

Okay, so it was only the first night, but the little I watched of Seth Meyers’ debut on “Late Night”, he looked uncomfortable. Again, I only watched up until the break before Amy Poehler, but the monologue was flat and the Venn Diagrams bit, while not awful, was desultory. The best moment was when Fred Armisen explained the premise of his show, “Recent History”, about things that happened within the last day.

Seth’s going to want to lean on Fred a lot the first month or two. He’ll find his voice, and Lorne Michaels did him no favors by having him work on SNL up until two weeks ago, but right now Meyers is a diffident host. Then again, it was only the first night.

2. Court Stormers: Head Coaches Edition

Turgeon was nearly this far out onto the court last night

Like most rules/laws that are enforced in a lax or capricious manner (speeding, traveling, investment bank rate-fixing, 9 o’clock bed time), those who defy the rules will never cease testing the limits. The latest abrogation that has become a trend: coaches standing on the basketball court during play. I hate this, because it’s the basketball equivalent of a dude leaning too close to your girl at a bar. He’s just seeing what he can get away with.

Anyway, Maryland coach Mark Turgeon took this to another level in last night’s game versus Syracuse. At least when Jim Boeheim stormed the court at Duke on Saturday, he knew that he was getting tossed.

Oh, and by the way, and I’ll never be able to prove it, moments before Louisville’s Kevin Ware gruesomely snapped his lower leg in half during last spring’s Elite Eight game, his coach, Rick Pitino, was standing almost on that same spot on the court. Did Ware instinctively correct for his jump because of Pitino’s presence? Again, I’ll never be able to prove that he did. But I’ll always wonder.

3. How Gr$$n Was My Valley

At least three of the five men pictured should be Indian in order for this group to be demographically accurate

HBO’s new show, “Silicon Valley”, as The Big Lead suggested, looks like a cross between “Entourage” and “The Big Bang Theory.” So what’s wrong with that? Personally, I’ve been a T.J. Miller fan ever since he played Stainer in She’s Out of My League, so I’ll watch just to see him. Dig it: the reason we don’t loathe Silicon Valley billionaires as much as we do Wall Street millionaires is because the former are actually way smarter than we are. It’s like, What do you call a roomful of lawyers? Guys who failed organic chemistry.

Sunday nights, come April, will have this and “Game of Thrones” back to back? You had me at HBO.

4. Raymond Felton Arrested

I thought he was a point guard. Apparently, he’s a shooting guard.

5. Sachs Entertainment

The man behind the Goldman Sachs Elevator Twitter feed has been unveiled, and his name is Jason McIntyre! Wait, no, that’s not it. Okay, wrong unveiling, wrong year. However, he has been found and it turns out Goldman Sachs will not fire him. Know why? Because he has never worked for Goldman Sachs.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P ; 1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B;1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF; 1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B; 1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B; 1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B; 1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B 1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P 1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P 1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul 1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF 1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P 1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

Christy Mathewson

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B 1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C 1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B 1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B 1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C 1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF 1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF 1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P 1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF 1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF 1963 Jackie Robinson, 2B; Zack Wheat, LF 1964: Jake Beckley, 1B; Rube Waddell, P 1965: Ralph Kiner, 1B, Lefty Grove, P 1966: Ted Williams, LF; Smoky Joe Wood, P/OF 

1967

Roy Campanella, C; 1948-1957, Brooklyn Dodgers

In his 10 seasons, before being paralyzed in an automobile accident, Campy was named to play in the All-Star Game eight times and won the National League MVP award three times. In each of his three MVP seasons, Campy hit over .300 with 30 or more home runs and 100 or more RBI.

Max Carey, OF; 1910-1929, Pittsburgh Pirates

Carey

The National League’s top base-stealer before the era of Maury Wills and Lou Brock, Carey led the Senior Circuit in swipes 10 of his 18 full seasons. His 738 career thefts are still ninth on the all-time list and only Ty Cobb stole home more times (50) in his career than Carey, who had 33. He also hit 419 doubles.

STARTING FIVE

Is it just me or is Dale, Jr., headed the wrong way?

 1. Junior Achievement

Rain delayed the Daytona 500 more than six hours so that it took almost 11 hours for Dale Earnhardt, Jr., to cover the 500 miles. In other words, you could have driven 500 miles in the time it took the winner of yesterday’s Great American Race 500 miles. By the way, it was Dale, Jr’s first NASCAR win in 55 starts. Did Ricky Bobby even have that long of a drought?

During the interminable delay, Fox aired last year’s race but a lot of viewers who joined midway during the telecast were unaware of that. So if someone tells you today that they can’t believe Jimmie Johnson won Daytona two years in a row, just smile.

2. Outta Brooklyn, But Not Straight

Collins, fronting Kaman.

The Brooklynettes sign Jason Collins to a 10-day contract and that same night, last night, he becomes the first openly gay player to participate in an NBA game. Which is unremarkable, since no NBA player has ever actually had sex on court…during a game. But it is remarkable in that it breaks a boundary.

And yesterday I tweeted, “Brooklyn: Jackie Robinson and Jason Collins”, which was my way of noting that  a place that has had a total of two pro sports franchises for a combined 16 seasons in the past 70 years broke both the color and the LGBT barriers. Of course, some people decided that I was equating Robinson to Collins in terms of talent or significance. I was not. They’re tweets, kids. They’re not tweetises.

3. “True Detective” Recap

Scars, faces. So Tony Montana is the killer?

Television’s best show ties up the loose ends of 2002. Best moments:

–Rust Cohle to the Marshland Medea, shortly after her confession: “If you get the opportunity, you should kill yourself.” Vintage Rust.

–More vintage Rust. “You’re such a moron. You people will eat your young as long as you have something to salute.” Every week Rust delivers a gut punch to America, and God bless him.

–Cohle to Marty Hart, his final words to him for 10 years, just after their fight: “Nice hook, Marty.”

— Marty to the two young men who had sex with his daughter: “A man’s game charges a man’s price.” Of course, if it’s Marty banging the younger women, well, that’s cool. And it turns out Rust was prophetic (and this is how the series rewards its viewers) when he drolly asked, “Was that a down payment?” in Episode 2.

–The girl in the sanitarium. Perfect. It’s amazing how many minor characters in this series are mesmerizing. Pastor Theriot, Charlie, Lange, DeWall, and now her (there are others; just excellent work).

–Rust throws Marty into the tail light and 10 years later he still hasn’t fixed it. Is this his scar, a reminder to himself of his betrayal of both Marty and his own integrity? Of how he allowed himself to be, albeit briefly, exploited? Or is this how singularly focused he has become?

–I don’t know much, but I do know the old man with the white hair who resurfaced in the office last night is a very, very bad man. He’s Tuttle’s dirty deeds done dirt cheap man.

–Loved the moment when Rev. Tuttle asks what this is all about and Cohle answers matter-of-factly, “Dead women and children” just to see the look on Tuttle’s face. The whole purpose of that visit was for Cohle to let Tuttle know that he was onto him. Let the games begin. Beautiful stuff.

–As someone else noted, both of Marty’s women (Beth and Maggie) order dirty martinis in this episode.

–I’m beginning to wonder what Marty’s older daughter overheard or was told that caused her to create that scene with her dolls. It sounds a lot like what must transpire in the murders. If Rust had seen it, he would have pursued it. But Marty is not Rust. Marty is the guy who writes up the stats.

Marty decleats Rust. That had to hurt.

–There are no wasted scenes or lines in “True Detective.” I’m beginning to think that month Rust spent in Paris “getting drunk outside of Notre Dame” was part of his 2002-2010 exile.

–So, yes, Rust mowed Marty’s lawn. Speaking of grooming, I’m thinking Lawnmower Guy is the Purloined Letter of “True Detective.” Hiding in plain sight. Rust never got his name. Why was he mowing grass that didn’t need mowing? Was the beard hiding scars? Why was he mowing the yard of an abandoned, decrepit school for, anyway? Like others, I suspect we have not one murderer but a cult.

–Going back an episode, am I the only one who thought the tattoo on LeDoux’s right pec looked a little too much like Matthew McConaughey?

–One giveaway that I don’t understand: you can go on IMDB and see how many episodes a character is in. Lawnmower guy, for instance, is slated to return. How did Nic Pizzolatto allow that to happen?

–Let’s not forget that the ALS-type former baseball pitcher from Episode 1 had a devil catcher. I believe we’ll be seeing him again, too.

–Love Pastor Theriot. “All my life I wanted to be nearer to God, but the only nearness is silence.” He may be the second-most, if not THE most, decent person in this entire show. Marty’s younger daughter is No. 1.

-The silent trading of flipped birds between Marty and Rust. Seriously, is this the best love story on television right now?

–Lots of rolling up of sleeves in this episode. Again, nothing ever is a coincidence on this show. Everything conveys something.

–Marty’s tackle of Rust was better than anything the NFL Network showed from the Combine all weekend.

–Terry Guidry, yet another authentic Cajun in this episode. And it’s the second stranger in two weeks who’s told Rust he may have to hurt him.

–After ten years: “Marty.” “Rust.” Love it.

4. So Long, Sochi

The Bear pokes fun at itself? Nicely done, Russia.

The Sochi Olympics, in which Canada ruled the beer sports (hockey, curling) and the USA ruled the stoner sports (anything -cross or -pipe). Also, the Olympics during which a neighboring country’s ruler was overthrown. Also, Team USA claimed the most BRONZE medals. Go, America! Will anything have a greater legacy to Americans’ than Bob Costas’ eye infection? I wonder.

5. Boeheim Watch

People are criticizing Syracuse coach Jim Boeheim for losing it with his team only down two in the final minute at Cameron. I get it. But this wasn’t an NCAA tournament game and, calculated or not, Boeheim sent a powerful message both to officials (be consistent) and his players (I’ve got your backs). Me, I thought Syracuse got hosed more on the previous blocking foul call than on the charge against C.J. Fair (who, by the way,s stepped out of bounds as he caught the pass, but the refs never noticed). The Fair call could have gone either way, it was that close.

Reserves

So, Alec Baldwin is retiring from public life? Jack Donaghy makes some excellent points here –and crucifies MSNBC honcho Peter Griffin –but when you wind up bickering with that many people in that many different arenas, well… (We now pause for the pot to call the kettle black).

****

I saw the final play of the Knicks’ season on Friday night. It was when, with the score tied 113-113 in the first overtime in Orlando –after the Carmelos blew a 14-point second-half lead–Tyson Chandler missed a go-ahead dunk because it bounced off his head and ricocheted up and out of the cylinder. Did Chandler style just a tad much on the play? I thought so.

The Knicks should be a top-five team in the East. Carmelo is one of the three to five best players in the NBA, when he wants to be. Tim Hardaway, Jr., is going to be a stud. If J.R. Smith gave half a rat’s ass, he could be the NBA’s Sixth Man of the Year. And Amar’e and Tyson still have something left in their tank.

This is just a team that takes on the demeanor of its best player, which is to to be loose and careless. You know who the Knicks are? They’re that kid who’s so smart that he can get away with waking up at 6 a.m. the morning of the exam  to begin studying and still pass it. Except that eventually comes a day when the kid wakes up and thinks the exam is at 10 a.m. but it’s actually at 8 a.m. Those are your New York Knicks.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P ; 1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B;1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF; 1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B; 1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B; 1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B; 1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B 1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P 1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P 1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul 1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF 1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P 1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

Walter Johnson, alias “The Big Train”, and the only Hall of Famer whose full name has all the same letters, almost in order, as your author’s (plus an “on”)

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B 1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C 1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B 1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B 1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C 1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF 1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF 1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P 1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF 1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF 1963 Jackie Robinson, 2B; Zack Wheat, LF 1964: Jake Beckley, 1B; Rube Waddell, P 1965: Ralph Kiner, 1B, Lefty Grove, P

1966

Ted Williams, LF; 1939-1942, 1946-1960, Boston Red Sox

The last man to hit .400 in a season (.406 in 1941), Teddy Ballgame is baseball’s all-time leader in On-Base Percentage (.4817) and seventh in batting average, .3444. Every hitter above him on the list was born in the 19th century. Williams, a 17-time All-Star who twice won the Triple Crown,  is simply the best hitter of the modern era. Only three years of military service as a pilot in World War II prevented him from reaching 3,000 hits (2,654). Fittingly, he homered in his final career at-bat, in Fenway Park.

Smoky Joe Wood, P/OF; 1908-1922, Boston Red Sox, Indians

The great Walter Johnson himself said there was no one alive who could throw harder than Smoky Joe.

Wood is the first player to appear on this list who is not actually in the Hall of Fame, and there’s another player –from this same era–who first pitched for the Red Sox only to play outfield for another American League team, but he is deserving. First, in 1912 he went 34-5 with a 1.91 ERA, 10 shutouts and a no-hitter. He won three games in that year’s World Series for the victorious Red Sox, including striking out 11 New York Giants in one game. For his career Wood was 117-57 with a 2.03 ERA. As a batter he hit .283.

 Remote Patrol

Late Night with Seth Meyers

NBC 12:35 a.m.

While Jimmy Fallon subscribes to the Elvis Method of late-night (“A little less talk, a little more action”), expect Meyers, 40, to be a little more akin to Conan and Dave. He’s not a performer, he’s a writer who is good-looking and personable. Fallon is the guy at the party who’s always on. Seth is the guy you’ll have the 15-minute conversation with about what the dining hall serves for breakfast.

 STARTING FIVE

“Congratu–….oh, never mind.”

1. Frozen

“Do you believe in soul-crushing losses that will haunt you for the rest of your lives? YES!”

Canada-USA, women’s hockey, gold-medal match. The Canadians entered having won the past three gold medals in this event dating back to Salt Lake City in 2002. But, with less than four minutes to play the U.S. led 2-0. Then it was 2-1 late when the US slapped a 3/4-rink shot at Canada’s empty net that —-oooooohhhh!–jus ricocheted off the left post. But, who cares, the American lasses were still up 2-1 at that point.

Then…uh-oh. Canada scores with :54 left to tie it up. Then, in overtime, the U.S. is late on a substitution, which leads to a Canadian breakaway, which leads to a penalty, which leads to a power play on which the Canucks score the decisive goal.

Jerry Seinfeld’s riff on not wanting to win silver has never been more applicable.

2. “The New York Knicks: A Tragic Misstep in Evolution”

James Dolan: The King in Yellow

This piece from Grantland is satire executed to perfection. I read “True Knicks Detective“, loved it, then spent the next six hours kicking myself for not having thought of it. Well done, Netw3rk. Take a bow.

3. “And You May Contribute a Verse…”

Step away from your cubicle, this video seems to be saying. A wonderful sermon on what it’s all about, with what I believe are the Cliffs of Moher –or somewhere that resembles it– in the background. Your narrator is Mickey Smith. Well worth your time. This video is not as worthy of your time, but the hypnotic beat and quick cuts kept my attention for far longer than I thought it would.

4. “Cleveland Rocks, Cleveland Rocks….”

Dr. K? Irving rocked the All-Star Game.

No longer are they the Cadaverliers. On February 6 Cleveland, one day after losing at home to the LOLakers and losers of six straight, fired general manager Chris Grant. The guy who signed Andrew Bynum. The guy who made Anthony Bennett the No. 1 overall pick in last June’s NBA draft.

Honestly, do you ever wonder how people such as Grant land these gigs while you and I do not?

Anyway, since that day, when the Cavs were a moribund 16-33, they are 6-0. Cleveland owns the NBA’s longest win streak and are only three games out of a playoff spot. Also, Cav poin guard Kryie Irving was named MVP of the NBA All-Star Game.

I don’t understand it, either, but it is happening. And I think we are all just hoping the Cavs finish in the 7th or 8th spot and meet Miami in the first round of the playoffs.

5. Farewell (For Now), Matt

This is NOT Matt Taibbi, but rather Carolyn Murphy at the SI Swimsuit Legends shoot. The staff of Medium Happy regrets the error.

America’s hands-down best, most important, pissed-off journalist, Matt Taibbi, is leaving Rolling Stone for his own independent venture. The man who once had the temerity to refer to Goldman Sachs as “great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money”, is flying off from Jann Wenner’s nest to run his own publication focused on financial and political corruption.

I prefer my badass muckraking to sprinkled with some bikini shots of Rihanna in Barbados along with a 5-star review of Bob Dylan’s latest burp, but that’s just me, I’m from Texas.

Reserves

No, that is not Iulia Lipnitskaya in disguise

A goalie for the minor league Allen Americans, Mark Guggenberger, is suspended and fined after tripping the opposing team’s mascot. Or is that referred to as “slew-footing?” Either way, that’s not nice.

***
The Broadway musical “Bronx Bombers” will close after a one-month run. “Bombers Bombs” the New York Post headline should read. So, it’s no Damn Yankees. Gotta love a show about the Yanks whose run is shorter than Derek Jeter’s retirement lap season.

***

In an Alabama girls high school basketball state championship game, top-ranked Glenwood took a 3-1 lead into halftime versus No. 2 Lee-Scott, then ran away in the second half for a 15-2 victory. Tom Green has your story. The game featured just two field goals and none by Lee-Scott, whose coach, Chad Prewett, elected to freeze the ball after having lost thrice earlier in the season to Glenwood.

*****

CORNUTOPIA: A piece on hoops in the heartland this season…

****

Science says that we’ve already had the time of our lives. I bet Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes would agree….

*****

Matt Lauer picks low-hanging fruit at colleague Bob Costas’ expense. On the one hand, you salute Costas for taking the dig as well as he did. On the other, you figure Lauer, whose sleep schedule must’ve been royally screwed by pulling double duty on Today and for NBC primetime last week, earned the right to take a shot.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P ; 1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B; 1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF; 1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B; 1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B; 1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B; 1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B 1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P 1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P 1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul 1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF 1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P 1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

Honus Wagner

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B 1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C 1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B 1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B 1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B 1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P 1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C 1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF 1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF 1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P 1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P 1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF 1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF 1963 Jackie Robinson, 2B; Zack Wheat, LF 1964: Jake Beckley, 1B; Rube Waddell, P

1965:

Ralph Kiner, 1B/LF; 1946-1955, Pittsburgh Pirates, 2 others

A genuine slugger, and one of the more well-liked players (and broadcasters) ever to grace a diamond, Kiner led the National League in home runs in each of his first seven seasons. He topped the 50-homer mark twice, the first National Leaguer to do so. A back injury abbreviated his career so that his career total is only 369, or an average of 36.9 per season. Kiner, who died earlier this month at the age of 91, was a U.S. Navy pilot in World War II. He enlisted voluntarily the day after Pearl Harbor.

Robert Moses “Lefty” Grove, P; 1925-1941, Philadelphia A’s, Boston Red Sox

So popular that they named a shopping mall in downtown Los Angeles after him.

One of two pitchers who won exactly 300 games (the other, Early Wynn), Grove’s career record of 300-141 is complemented by his having led the American League in strikeouts in each of his first seven seasons. An eight-time 20-game winner, Grove led the A.L. in ERA in nine different seasons. Between 1928-1931, Grove was absolutely dominant, with a 103-23 record. Among 300-game winners, Grove’s .680 winning percentage is tops.

Remote Patrol

The Tonight Show

NBC 11:30 p.m.

One and only one guest will appear on the first Friday of host Jimmy Fallon’s tenure: BPF –that’s “Best Performing Friend”– Justin Timberlake. History of Rap 5, anyone?

STARTING FIVE

Jan Koum: He feels like a billion (or more like 9 billion) dollars today.

 1. What’s App’ening!

Scores of people in the Bay Area, the nation’s wealthiest region, became wealthy or wealthier yesterday. First, the owner(s) of a single ticket purchased in the town of Milpitas, which sits at the base of San Francisco Bay, will claim the $425 million Powerball lottery prize, the sixth-largest such jackpot in history. A little farther up the 101 in Mountain View, a college dropout named Jan Koum and his partner Brian Acton sold their start-up, What’s App, to Facebook for $19 BILLION.

The company only earned $20 million last year but suddenly, thanks to Mark Zuckerberg’s munificence, it is worth more than 47% of the companies in the S&P 500. Koum, a Ukrainian immigrant, signed the deal with Facebook –a company that once turned him down for the job– on the door of a government building where he once stood on line for food stamps.

You cannot make this stuff up.

2. Syracluse

I doubt we’ll be seeing this uniform combo again.

The orange tops and blue trunks were a bad look for the nation’s No. 1 and undefeated team at home. A worse look? Losing to Boston College, which had already lost twice this month to Notre Dame and had just two conference wins. When Patric Young, the Florida center whose own No.2 team survived a brush with disaster versus Auburn last night, heard who had spoiled Syracuse’s perfect season, he put it succinctly: “Boston College? They suck.”

It was a terrific win for the Eagles, of course, made sweeter after the loss of a family member of sorts: longtime sports information director Dick Kelley, who had been suffering from ALS, died over the weekend. The team attended his wake just two days earlier.

3. The Russian Drill Bit

Lipnitskaya’s influences? Katerina Witt and Gumby.

Iulia Lipnitskaya, the 15 year-old Russian skating prodigy who is Olympic-eligible by only 26 days, bit it on her final jump of the ladies’ short program on Wednesday, putting her in fifth place. She may not medal, but if you have not seen Lipnitskaya skate, it’s a phenomenon of human axis-spinning. Only the Tasmanian Devil spins faster than she does. Watch (near the end of the program).

4. Rice Capades

NFL Concussions: Why should players have all the fun?

Baltimore Raven running back Ray Rice allegedly hits his fiancée with an open hand and knocks her out cold. Video shows Rice dragging her out of an elevator at an Atlantic City casino. But at least he isn’t gay, right?

5. Hashtag You’re It

You do a hashtag bit referencing “Friends” and fail to note there was an actual character named Tag??? HashtagTag.

I’ll stop posting Jimmy Fallon items and videos as soon as he stops doing stuff worth sharing with you. Fallon’s Tonight Show isn’t a talk show and it’s barely a variety show. It’s more of a “Can Celebrities 1-3 Come Over To My House and Play?” Last night Fallon played charades with Oscar nominees Bradley Cooper and Emma Thompson and Taylor Swift’s original candy crush, Tim McGraw, but the better segment was his Hashtag bit (something he’s done before with Justin Timberlake) with yet another Oscar nominee, Jonah Hill.

Not sure whose idea it was to have Cooper give Fallon the Chrysler Building piece as a gift. Anyone who’d watched the first two shows knew it had already been there. Hashtag falling flat.

Reserves

I do hope the text was from Dyan Cannon.

Perfect moment in the Lakers-Rockets game last night. Just as Mike Breen and Jeff Van Gundy were noting that the talent-bereft Lakers still play hard night in and night out, ESPN’s cameras caught Swaggy P, in dress clothes on the bench, checking his smart phone for messages. Thank you.

Oh, and last night ESPN had Rockets-Lakers, a 26-point blowout, instead of Spurs over Trail Blazers by two in Portland. Tomorrow night ESPN has Celtics-Lakers instead of Spurs at Suns.

Someone, anyone at ESPN: We get it, LA is an iconic franchise. But they’re HORRIBLE this season. And it’s not going to get better. Please move on.

****
Kudos to Pablo S. Torre for sitting in and hosting Olbermann (“This is Olbermann…I’m not Olbermann”) and doing a terrific job.

***

Sather Nielsen is a former UCLA volleyball player and current Bruin grad assistant.

That’s Kaitlin Sather-Nielsen on the cover of the current issue of Runner’s World. Sather Nielsen is not a runner per se, but rather a former Honorable Mention All-American volleyball player (and high jumper) at UCLA.

****

Pretty cool Saturday for middle-distance prodigy Mary Cain. On a snowy New York day, Cain won the mile at the Millrose Games, which took place at the intimate New York Armory in Harlem (picture the NBA All-Star Game taking place at Hinkle Fieldhouse and… WAIT A MINUTE, that’s a great idea!), which is situated directly across 167th Street from Columbia Presbyterian, the hospital where her dad works as an anesthesiologist.

Coburn Notice

Personal note: As I was walking from subway to Armory entrance, I came upon three young women in unbelievable shape running past me. They all looked Scandinavian. This is not something you ordinarily see in Harlem. Turns out they were entrants in the mile (Emma Coburn and others) who were warming up. There was nowhere to warm up indoors.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P ; 1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B; 1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF; 1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B; 1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B; 1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B; 1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B 1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P 1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P 1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul 1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF 1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P 1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS 1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B 1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C 1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B 1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B 1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B 1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P 1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C 1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF 1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF 1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P 1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P 1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF 1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF 1963 Jackie Robinson, 2B; Zack Wheat, LF

1964:

Jake Beckley, 1B; 1888-1907, 6 teams, Pittsburgh Pirates

Besides a career batting average of .309 with 2,934 hits (34th all-time) and 1,578 RBI (40th all-time), “Eagle Eye” was a cunning fielder. After failing to fool Honus Wagner with the hidden-ball trick, he waited until later in the season and got the better of Wagner. How? By using TWO baseballs! Genius.

Rube Waddell, P; 1897-1910, 6 teams, Philadelphia A’s

Waddell, an alcoholic, died at the age of 37

From 1902-1907, all with the A’s, Waddell led the National League in strikeouts while also being a 20-game winner in four of those seasons. A true character, Waddell wrestled alligators in the off-season and reportedly spent his entire first signing bonus on a drinking binge, leading one publication to refer to him as a “sousepaw.” Still, on the all-time lists, he ranks 10th in ERA (2.16), 18th in WHIP (1.102) and 19th in shutouts (50).

Remote Patrol

Sochi Olympics

NBC 8 p.m.

The finals of the ladies’ figure skating. Our favorite Amy Adams doppelganger, Ashley Wagner (a stage name if I ever heard one), will perform both on ice and in the kiss-and-cry area.

STARTING FIVE

Alex will sit the rest of the Olympics out.

 1. Do You Believe in Gulags? YES!

Russia, your Olympic hosts, were bent on revenge against Team USA in hockey, meeting them on home ice in an Olympics for the first time since the upset in Lake Placid in 1980. Instead, they lost last Saturday in shootout thanks to an unmoored goal –and, perhaps, to an assiduous-to-a-fault referee. And then they lost earlier today to Finland, which means that the Russians, with arguably the world’s greatest current hockey player, Alex Ovechkin, on their side, will not even advance to the medal round.

Russian coach Zinetula Bilyaletdinov, who was a defenseman on that 1980 Russian squad, was understandably out of sorts after Thursday’s defeat. A snippet of his exchange with reporters, per The Wall Street Journal:

Q: What future, if any, do you see for your own work and for your coaching staff? Because, you know, your predecessor was eaten alive after the Olympics—

A: Well then, eat me alive right now—

Q: No, I mean—

A: Eat me, and I won’t be here anymore.

Q: But we have the world championship coming up!

A: Well then, there will be a different coach because I won’t exist any more, since you will have eaten me.’

Suddenly, I’m not hungry.

2. Schwing! Set

Cheese, Danish: Nina Agdal

For its 50th anniversary Swimsuit Issue, Sports Illustrated invited the winners of the “Second Half, 20th Century Gene Pool Lottery”, i.e., its former cover models, to assemble in one room for an historic shoot. Here’s video (“She was a long, cool woman in a black dress...”). In a roomful of stunners, Carolyn Murphy and Bar Refaeli stand out for me, but…your mileage may vary.

3. Rap-Time Gals

Now let’s move from rap to heavy metal…

It’s a brilliant idea –sing rap and hip-hop songs, often containing sexually explicit lyrics, as a barbershop quartet. Jimmy Fallon had done it before but last night the “Ragtime Gals” made their Tonight Show debut. Here’s the video. Jerry Seinfeld became the first comedian to do stand-up in the Fallon era, and while his bit on cellphones was good, his rant on the couch about coddled children was even better. Seinfeld referenced a “stuffed-animal semi-circle of emotional support” on his children’s beds and wondered why every bedtime had to be a “royal jubilee coronation.”

Seinfeld also had a great term for being the Tonight Show host: “It’s a ‘pope job’. It’s a job you have until you die.”

The most dramatic difference between Fallon and everyone else (Kimmel, Letterman, Leno, Conan, etc.) is that he’s a performer first. Can you imagine Letterman being part of a barbershop quartet? Never. Not even to send up the entire construct. Fallon throws himself into musical bits and he’s actually quite good. Studio 6B is his basement playroom, except the pay is far better.

4. Bode Language

“You’re sad?!? I wasn’t asked to appear in this year’s SI Swimsuit issue.”

By now it’s clear that Christin Cooper’s post-race interview with American skier Bode Miller has overshadowed Miller’s bronze-medal effort itself. Might I suggest that it’s on the Mount Rushmore of Sochi Olympic moments? (Here, I’ve got a vomit bucket right here). Former SI scribe Jeff Pearlman suggests that parts of the interview were staged, though he does not name his source. I’m 98% certain that nothing about Miller’s emotions were disingenuous, but Pearlman does make a fine point about lovely Morgan Miller, Bode’s wife, being allowed into the Mixed Zone. Did she technically become credentialed media after NBC kept mic’ing her up during races?

Then there’s Keith Olbermann, who is media-astute and highly intelligent, but also possessed of the world’s largest blind spot. Olbermann rips Cooper and the media in general for playing up death in Olympic stories, and that’s fair.

“It’s interesting when people die/Give us dirty laundry,” as Don Henley once crooned.

“I’m mad as hell–unless you work for Disney.”

Of course, television’s worst offender of the Overly Maudlin Feature is ESPN’s own Tom Rinaldi, whose frequent descents into death and debilitating illness inspired its own Spencer Hall blog post (that’s when you KNOW you’ve made it). Would or has Olbermann ever criticize Rinaldi or any other ESPN on-air personality on his show? And if he did, would he ever pursue it with the rabid zeal with which he went after Cooper?

That blind spot is what prevents a solid program from being terrific. Olbermann fashions himself as a latter-day Howard Beale for sports media, except that he has cut a deal with the devil (i.e., Norby….Norby is a euphemism for all Bristol suits) that he’ll never bite the WWL that feeds. Which is sort of like fashioning yourself as the world’s leading zoologist but you’re never allowed to visit the Amazon. Or Africa. (I’m not sure which one of those is the ESPN2 of zoology).

So, rant on, Keith. But every time you do, please have a flashing sign, like in one of those old Crazy Eddie ads, that reads “Unable To Criticize ESPN” on the screen as you do.

5. How I Met Your Top Ten List

Also performing on this show: John Legen…wait for it…d.

The cast of HIMYM appears on Letterman and reads a list of “Top 10 Surprises in the Final Episode.” No. 5 is a gem, but it felt as if they missed a real opportunity here by not using some variation of “I marry Rachel just before she moves to Paris.”

Also, “spies” tell us that HIMYM’s entire cast will be taping an episode of “Inside the Actor’s Studio” to discuss “the craft” of sitcommery.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P.

1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B

1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF

1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B

1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B

1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B

1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B

1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P

1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P

1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul

1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF

1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P

1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B

1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C

1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B

1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B

1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B

1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P

1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C

1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF

1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF

1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P

1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P

1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF

1962: Luke Appling, SS; Jesse Burkett, LF

1963:

Jackie Robinson, 2B; 1947-1956, Brooklyn Dodgers

Even if he had not broken baseball’s  “color line” on April 15, 1947 at the age of 28, Robinson’s career is Hall-worthy. A lifetime .311 hitter, No. 42 was baseball’s inaugural Rookie of the Year in 1947 and was the National League MVP in 1949. He also stole home 19 times in his career, and none of those came on a double steal.

Zack Wheat, LF; 1909-1927, Brooklyn Superbas/Dodgers/Robins

Missed out on a lucrative endorsement deal for Wheat Thins.

The son of a full-blood Cherokee woman, Wheat had three consecutive seasons of batting .359 or better and retired with a .317 average and 2,884 career hits. While so many other Dodgers (including the one above) are more acclaimed, it is Wheat who still holds the franchise records for hits, doubles, triples and total bases.

STARTING FIVE

The Chysler Building gets big play on the new set. As does, by extension, the borough of Queens.

1. Top Jimmy*

After nearly 45 years in exile in Burbank, The Tonight Show returned to New York City last night with new host Jimmy Fallon. It’s now Jimmy Fallon versus Jimmy Kimmel for the foreseeable future in late-night, as my beloved David Letterman should probably pull a Derek Jeter soon.

I wrote about the premiere episode this morning, but allow me to reemphasize how much work Fallon needs as an interviewer. A suggestion: watch clips of old Carson interviews to learn timing. Johnny never worried about waiting a beat for his guest to respond. An interlude of silence, even for a second or two, never detracted from the moment. In fact, sometimes the silence and Carson’s allowing it to get just a tad uncomfortable for the guest WAS the moment.

The Master

It’s something that Fallon, and Conan O’Brien as well, have never appeared to understand.

Also, interesting how Will Smith noted that Fallon genuinely wants to make people happy, that he is nice, and I agree. But then in the next segment with U2 Fallon, more out of nervousness than wickedness, told Bono that he could give a great speech about anything and asked him to speak about a coffee cup. He didn’t realize it in the moment, but it was patronizing. It was belittling all the causes that Bono feels so passionately about. And, in a brief moment of candor, Bono said, “Well, that’s not nice.”

As @nd_fredo noted, this was Fallon telling Bono to “sell me this pen.”

But, because Bono is Bono and not an ass, he gave it a shot. You could tell that he didn’t want to do it. I don’t think that moment was staged. It was Fallon’s big miss on an otherwise terrific opening night.

*The judges would also accept “Jimmy Thing.”

2. Eye-o-See

Welcome back, Bob!

NBC’s Olympics host Bob Costas’ eyes clear up just as Sochi turns foggy. Coincidence? I think not.

3. Unbroken

Angelina and Louie

My favorite read of the past few years is Laura Hillenbrand’s Unbroken, the true tale of Louis Zamperini. If you don’t already know his story, Zamperini ran in the 1936 Olympics, met Hitler, then had his plane shot down during World War II and survived with a buddy for 43 days in the Pacific Ocean. And then things really got hairy.

Zamperini, a USC alum, is still alive and there’s a great photo of him snuggling with the director of the film that is being released based on the book, Angelina Jolie. So, yes, he really did have something to live for. Fight on!

Here’s a trailer/video that made its debut during NBC’s Olympics coverage on Sunday evening.

4. The Devil and Marty Hart

Let’s get past the obvious pun: Marty Hart and Mardi Gras. Not that “Hart” and “Gras”, which means fat, are related, but I wondered if that’s where Louisiana bayou native Nic Pizzolatto drew the inspiration for the detective’s name. True Detective is a can’t-put-it-down novel played out over eight –really, nine-Sunday evenings. And Pizzolatto enjoys layering his story with clues and potential red herrings. We’re five episodes through and anyone who tells you that they know how this is going to end is fooling themselves.

Consider Hart: He’s the one guy I was sure is innocent (and I still believe he is). But the modern detectives are chasing Cohle. But, as a Twitter follower, @keepsbreakndown, noticed, Marty has twice sabotaged chances Rust had to collect more evidence: first, when he called him to the police car to inform him about Reggie LeDoux, which prevented Cohle from entering the school. And second, when he shot Ledoux in the head, thereby pulling a Jack Ruby.

And you can make a case that Marty hates prostitutes: see how he hands a minor a large bill and tells her, “Do something different.” (or maybe he just bet her that she’d never host The Tonight Show). Also, Marty has twice had the opportunity to hand the case to the task force but he’d rather keep it with him and Rust.

On the other hand, it was Marty who found the church at the end of Episode 2. And even in both moments when he sabotaged Cohle’s chances, we are led to believe that he honestly had no guile about his actions.

Listen, this show is a masterpiece. So much texture here. Every moment develops or reveals character. Like when Rust asks Marty if he has ever hunted. Marty answers affirmatively, and then Rust demeans Marty’s version of hunting (“sitting in a tree blind as your bait lures the deer”) to real hunting, tracking game. And Marty calls him an asshole. Note how far we’ve come: Marty may still not appreciate Rust’s lack of tact, but he has come to accept that he is in the presence of a superior detective, if not person.

And then there’s the cinematography by Adam Arkapaw: the cobalt-blue bayou at night as Marty drives to the rave. The reflection of Cohle in the window as he walks out on Maggie in the diner. The angry gray sky behind Rust as he revisits the scene of the murder seven years later. It’s all brilliant.

My guess, and that’s all it is: Rust’s burnout mode is itself a cover. He thinks he knows how far up these ritual killings go and he’s decided to go rogue. Are he and Marty still in communication? After all, Marty only owes him his career and avoiding a murder charge. If so, then Cohle would have briefed Marty in the five days between their respective interviews.  I noticed the time stamps on those interviews very early. We were always supposed to know that they got to Rust first.

Finally, consider how far Pizzolatto goes to include moments that he finds fun or mysterious. The scene in Episode 3 where Rust borrows the lawn mower? Why would a guy who lives in an apartment complex need a lawn mower? But it allows for the whole “I like mowing MY lawn” scene, which is a call-back o something Woody Harrelson said in “Kingpin”, a movie from 20 years ago. Just something to think about.

5. Sleeve It Alone

Defense? We’d rather watch.

Thanks to @okerland for noticing that the highest-scoring game in NBA All-Star history (163-155, or 318 points)  involved players wearing full shirt sleeves. I do believe we can have a 200-point score from one team next year if they just wear long flannels.

My idea for next year: a 12th-man All-Star Game, pitting the 12 best 12th men from the East versus the West. An even more Darwinian idea: the league’s 12 worst 12th men –all of whom having been with their teams since start of season –versus a D-League All-Star team.

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P.

1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B

1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF

1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B

1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B

1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B

1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B

1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P

1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P

1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul

1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF

1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P

1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B

1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C

1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B

1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B

1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B

1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P

1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C

1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF

1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF

1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P

1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P

1961: Bob Feller, P; Ducky Medwick, LF

1962:

Luke Appling, SS; 1930-1943, 1944-1950, Chicago White Sox

When he retired in 1950, “Old Aches and Pains” was baseball’s all-time leader in games played (2,422) and double plays involved in. He hit .388 in 1938, his best season, and for his career struck out less than once every 19 plate appearances.

Jesse Burkett, LF; 1890-1905, five teams, including the Cleveland Spiders

“Crab” was due to the fact that he was baseball’s first exo-skeletal player?

On a very short list of men who have hit .400 or above more than once, Burkett batted .405 in 1895 and .410 in 1896, the latter season in which he had 240 hits. A career .338 hitter, “Crab” collected 2,850 hits and 389 stolen bases and also is the game’s all-time leader in inside-the-park home runs with 55.

STARTING FIVE

He shoots, he scores…again and again and again.

1. Oshie in Soshi

Just the idea of a galvanizing Olympic hockey match airing at 7:30 a.m. on a Saturday morning on the East Coast was awesome. Add what should have been a game-winning goal with four minutes remaining for the hosts, Russia, being disallowed because the goal had com off its mooring (that puck was going in either way). Then sprinkle in a post-overtime shootout in which Team USA’s T.J. Oshie essentially became a one-man team, burying four shootout goals in six attempts. And, finally, NBC announcer Doc Emrick’s masterful job, harkening back to Herb Brooks‘ 1980 pre-game speech to his underdog squad in Lake Placid when he intoned, “Not this game. Not tonight.”

Oshie with fiancee Lauren Cosgrove, who is back home in St. Louis now, eight months pregnant.

2. The Princess of Sunday Night

All that Sharbino (left) needs now is a recurring role on Downton Abbey to pull off the Sunday night hat trick.

If you think you have a dilemma as to whether to watch True Detective at 9 p.m. and DVR The Walking Dead or vice-versa, imagine what it must be like for 12 year-old Brighton Sharbino. She’s been a regular on the latter show as precocious (and ruthless) Lizzy for awhile now and last night she made her debut as the older version of Macie Hart. She made the eighth-grade cheer squad, you know, and there were like 10 girls who tried out and didn’t make it.

3. Sky High

If you’ve ever attempted to pole vault, then you probably have great respect for anyone who can do it. People always talk about how there’s nothing harder in sports than hitting a Major League fastball. You can at least whip out your bat and per chance get lucky. That ain’t happening in pole vault.

Speaking of get lucky, another Frenchman bathed in glory over the weekend as Renaud Lavillenie broke Sergey Bubka’s long-standing  pole vault world record with a vault of 6.16 meters (20 feet, 2 inches). Lavillenie broke Bubka’s record by 1/100th of a meter (or what some people refer to as a centimeter), a mark that had stood for nearly 21 years. Both Bubka’s effort and Lavilenie’s efforts took place at the same venue in Bubka’s hometown of Donestk, Ukraine, and the legendary Bubka was there to witness it.

“A new era in the sport has arrived,” Bubka, 50, graciously told reporters.

As for Lavillenie, the reigning Olympic gold medalist, he never even grazed the bar in his first attempt at that height. “It’s going to take me awhile to come down,” Lavillenie said.

By the laws of gravity, it already, relative to every one before him who ever had pole-vaulted, had.

4. For Goodness’ Snake

Adderall, while a powerful drug, has no therapeutic use in adder bites.

A Kentucky pastor who had been featured on a Natural Geographic reality show because handling venomous serpents is part of his ministry is bitten on the hand by a rattlesnake, refuses treatment, and dies. Pastor Jamie Coots of Jesus Name Church in Middlesboro, Ky., had actually been bitten eight times previously without, of course, such an adder-verse reaction.

“We’re going to go home, he’s going to lay on the couch, he’s going to hurt, he’s going to pray for a while and he’s going to get better,” said Coots’ son, Cod. “That’s what happened every other time, except this time was just so quick and it was crazy, it was really crazy.”

You might say that Coots was praying with fire.

5. BAFTA, The Best Medicine

Host Stephen Fry with that chick who wrote Mary Poppins.

The British are funnier than we are. They’re delightfully more self-deprecating (Ricky Gervais is an impostor). You know this. I know this. We’ve all seen Four Weddings and a Funeral and Notting Hill and Love, Actually, after all. Watched the guy who plays House at the Emmys and Golden Globes.

So, of course, their version of the Oscars, the BAFTAs, will be superior to ours. Here’s what host Stephen Fry advised all the winners-to-be at the start of the evening, for example: “When you are given a cup of tea, you don’t thank the kettle, the cup, the milk, the cow, the tea picker… Award winners, I trust I make myself clear. The briefer you are the more we will love, reverence and adore you.”

The Hall

Charter Inductees: Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Mathewson, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner

1937:  Tris Speaker, CF; Cy Young, P.

1938: Grover Cleveland Alexander, P; Eddie Collins, 2B

1939:Nap Lajoie, 2B; Joe Jackson, LF

1940: Billy Hamilton, OF; Cap Anson, 1B

1941: Wee Willie Keeler, RF; George Sisler, 1B

1942: Rogers Hornsby, 2B; Pie Traynor, 3B

1943: Mickey Cochrane, C; Frankie Frisch, 2B

1944: Ed Walsh, P; Old Hoss Radbourn, P

1945: Lou Gehrig, 1B; Kid Nichols, P

1946: Ed Delahanty, LF; Lefty O’Doul

1947: Pud Galvin, P; John McGraw, INF

1948: Carl Hubbell, P; Addie Joss, P

1949: Harry Heilman, OF/1B; Monte Ward, P/SS

1950: Cool Papa Bell, CF; Jimmie Foxx, 1B

1951: Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown, P; Josh Gibson, C

1952: Paul Waner, RF; Charlie Gehringer, 2B

1953: Mel Ott, RF; Hank Greenberg, 1B

1954: Eddie Plank, P; Dan Brouthers, 1B

1955: “Wahoo” Sam Crawford, OF; John Clarkson, P

1956: Chief Bender, P; Bill Dickey, C

1957: Sam Rice, RF; Joe DiMaggio, CF

1958: Bill Terry, 1B; Heinie Manush, LF

1959: Dizzy Dean, P; Tim Keefe, P

1960: Gabby Hartnett, C; Mickey Welch, P

1961:

Bob Feller, P; 1936-1941, 1945-1956, Cleveland Indians.

Rapid Robert, king of the wind-up.

“The Heater from Van Meter” surely would have been a 300-game winner had he not given four years of service to his country in World War II. Feller, 266-162 lifetime, settled for six 20-win seasons and seven times leading the American League in strikeouts between 1938 and 1951.

Joe “Ducky” Medwick, LF; 1932-1948, St. Louis Cardinals, three other teams

Medwick’s infamous slide.

Medwick had an offer from Knute Rockne to play football at Notre Dame, but chose the diamond instead. A 10-time All-Star with the Gashouse Gang, Medwick achieved the National League Triple Crown in 1937, a year in which he also named the league MVP. Besides being the last NL player to hit for the Triple Crown, Medwick holds the Major League record for most consecutive seasons with 40 or more doubles (7; 1933-1939). He retired with a .324 batting average.

Final note: Commissioner Kenesaw Mountain Landis tossed Medwick out of Game 7 of the 1934 World Series after he slid hard into third base on a triple and the Detroit Tiger fans began pelting him with garbage. Said Medwick, “I knew why they were throwing the garbage at me. What I don’t understand is why they brought it to the park in the first place.”

Remote Patrol

The Tonight Show

NBC 11:35 p.m.

In the words of Michael Stipe, “Fallon Me.” Jimmy Fallon assumes stewardship of NBC’s most precious franchise and returns it to 30 Rock for the first time since 1969. Well played, Jack Donaghy. Tonight’s guests are Will Smith and U2, which only proves that what Reggie LeDoux said about time being a flat circle since this broadcast probably first occurred in 2001.