IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Dis A Ray

Wow.

History will record that at the time Blake Snell was pulled from a do-or-die game in the World Series for the Tampa Bay Rays, he had struck out each of the first three hitters in the Los Angeles Dodger lineup twice. And their leadoff hitter, Mookie Betts, was about to come to bat for the third time.

So, in case you are not paying attention: six plate appearances for the Dodgers’ top three batters and six strikeouts.

The Rays led 1-0 with one out in the bottom of the sixth. Snell had struck out nine and allowed two singles, the latter to the Dodgers’ No. 9 hitter. The 6’4″ former Cy Young Award winner had PLENTY of gas left in the tank. And manager Kevin Cash pulled him.

Understand: this is a forever moment. This isn’t the second game of a three-game set in mid-May. Blake Snell, Kevin Cash, the Rays: they’re never coming back to this moment. Even if they all return to the World Series.

Blake Snell was pitching the game of his life in the most important game of his life and Cash, adhering to some arcane saber metric guidepost, robbed him of it. Robbed the entire team. Remember in Hoosiers when Norman Dale tried to diagram a game-winning play that would make Jimmy Chitwood the decoy and the rest of the Milan High team looked at him like he was batshit crazy? That was what happened last night in Arlington.

It’s tough enough to lose. It’s unforgivable when you out-manage yourself. Moneyball, yes. Cashball, no.

This Justin

No sooner had the Dodgers secured their first World Series title in 32 years than Fox’s Kevin Burkhardt reported that the reason third baseman Justin Turner had been pulled in the late innings was because he had tested positive for the coronavirus.

Then things really got weird.

First, one of my students phoned and posited the thought that what if the Rays had won Game 6? Would Game 7 have been postponed as the Dodgers quarantined? Then there was Turner out on the field celebrating with his teammates, which is completely understandable and yet, probably against MLB protocol.

THEN it really got weird when Fox’s Ken Rosenthal reported that Turner had tested positive on Monday, and again on Tuesday.

I may not be understanding Rosenthal well, but why is he talking about whether or not Turner should’ve been on the field during the celebration? Why isn’t he talking about why Turner was even in the game in the first place? He tested positive on Monday. Shouldn’t the second test have been about whether he could return to the field?

In other words, why let him take the field in Game 6 before a second test, for lack of a better word, exonerated him? And who is at fault here? MLB? The Dodgers? Turner? All?

Crazy ending, but then it fits our year.

And You Want To Be My Latex Salesman

Ole Miss coach was recently fined $25,000 by the SEC for questioning a call in the Rebels’ loss to Auburn on Saturday. Lane-changer was totally correct on the call, which cost his team a touchdown, but he whiffed (twice) on the math later when he suggested snarkily how he’d pay his fine.

Someone must have been sitting in the same math class as Mara Gay growing up.

A Higher Porpoise

Love this moment. It almost makes up for the spring break jackasses being responsible for a baby dolphin’s death a few years back because they all wanted to pose with it on the beach as it suffocated. Thankful for people like this.

Poocher Perfect

I guess we could’ve devoted this final item to what miserable human beings the Trump family are, and how the president left his rally goers in Omaha literally out in the cold as Air Force 1 flew off into the night, with all of them having to find their way back to their vehicles in freezing temps in lots that were nearly four miles away. At least nine of them were taken to hospitals and treated for hypothermia (as many—most?—are older and obese and probably will test positive for the coronavirus, too) and I suppose you could make a point about how it’s all a perfect metaphor for who Trump is and where his dumb(struck) acolytes will find themselves in the near future.

I suppose we could’ve riffed on that. But I’d rather show intelligent and amiable dogs. All of whom I’d rather hang out with than the average Trump supporter.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters*

*Double Espresso edition: smaller and extra-caffeinated.

Phillips 8-7

One of the most tremendous moments in World Series history. The last batter on the bench, facing a 1-2 count, lofts a single into right center. What follows is two errors, one baserunning gaffe, two runs, and an airplane moment in left field.

Fully Elongated Penix

An hour or two earlier in Bloomington, Indiana, Hoosier QB Michael Penix, Jr., stretches every inch of his frame to score (dubious) on a two-point conversion for the win against Penn State. This play only happened because the Nittany Lions scored with 1:42 to play when stopping for a first down would have ended the contest. The Atlanta Falcons learned nothing from this, losing in the same fashion the following day versus the Detroit Lions.

Under Cover Of Darkness

That sense of anger and sadness from more than 50% of the nation has less to do with who or what Amy Coney Barrett stands for and everything to do with how she backslid into a Supreme Court confirmation. And now you have Brett Kavanaugh proposing that he’ll be sure as hell to dismiss mail-in ballots.

Joe Biden may win Wisconsin… and Pennsylvania…and Ohio… and even Arizona. Will it even matter? That’s what Americans are asking themselves this morning. And if it does not, then our democracy is dead for the foreseeable future.

The question I keep asking myself is why would anyone believe that Mitch McConnell, William Barr and the S.C. judges are suddenly going to play fair. I don’t believe they will. Viva la revolucion!

Metcalf Roping

Seattle’s D.K. Metcalf with the definitive effort play every coach will show for the next 1,000 years. He could go on the speakers circuit off this play alone. Of course it helps to have world-class speed.

Meanwhile, when is Pete Carroll going to learn to NOT throw the ball deep in the red zone toward that particular end zone in this particular stadium????

On MAGA and Fascism

A couple clips from last night. First, this one:

And then, here’s Sacha Baron Cohen:

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Welker Wins

Once more, we watched none of the presidential debate, but from the social media approbation we sense that its winner was moderator Kristen Welker. So if you are scoring at home the worst of the three debate moderator was the Old White Guy Legacy (the son of legendary 60 Minutes news man Mike Wallace) while the best was the Woman Of Color.

Shocker.

How It Started…

…How It’s Going

By the way, two things: 1) More than 50 million Americans, including your humble (Ha!) scribe, have already voted and it is only October 23rd. That total represents 36% of the total votes from the 2016 election. I wonder what that might mean. 2) We ran into an older man walking around the supermarket with his wife yesterday clad in a shirt that read “If You Don’t Like Trump, Then You Won’t Like Me… And I’m Okay With That.” And of course even though he was wearing cargo shorts, he was toting a sidearm. If Trump loses I’m wondering how many fellows like this man might become super-spreaders of gun fire in public places.

Oh, Danny Boy, The Pipes, The Pipes Are Calling

This play last night more than sums up the New York Giants’ season, but New York pro football for the past decade. And yet, it is so beautiful and meme-worthy. Yes, that is World Series announcer Joe Buck, who is hogging all the sports events for Fox. I mean, he is really, really good but Buck flew from Dallas to Philly to cover the game and will be back in the booth in Dallas/Arlington tonight for Game 3.

“Man Lying On Couch Covered In Thin Layer Of Cheeto Dust Refers To Favorite Sports Teams As We…”

This breaking story comes courtesy of the Babylon Bee and I don’t know if it’s trying to compete with The Onion, but it’s quite a funny story. Our good friend Smo, who was on the text chain where the story came to my attention (via our other good friend, Fink!), noted that “Cheeto Dust” is my favorite J Crew color.

Black Hands Matter (All Hands Matter)

Those are the hands of U.S. Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and are they black because an Oscar Wilde-type literary fantasy came true? Is God slowly turn Mitch into a black man? Another curse brought down by RBG? Or is he C. Thomas Howell’ing it in order to get into Harvard?

Who knows? The most plausible-sounding guesses we’ve heard on the Twitter relate to blood thinners or other circulatory issues. Is that simply heavy bruising? Mitch also has a slight discoloration of similar pigment just above his lip?

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Barry, Gold Weaver

He waited nearly four years, but Barack Obama finally dunked on Donald Trump yesterday in the city that invented the shattered backboard. Wow. The whole speech is below:

President Trump does not react well to being mocked (few of us do). The last time Barack publicly humiliated him, back in 2015, Don reacted by running for president (and winning). Just sayin’.

Still, this must have been a cathartic moment for President Obama. Stay tuned.

Meanwhile, if you’re looking for a meme to perfectly encapsulate the Trump presidency:

How It Started…

….How It’s Going

Someone on Twitter thought of the above conceit, but I cannot find the tweet now. So, yes, I’m stealing his or her idea and I’d love to credit them for it.

Spare Parts

We hear it all the time: Hey, Dubs, when are you going to stop messing around with politics and provide more bowling coverage?!? So here you are. We’ve done this move quite often while bowling, just never intentionally.

Hello, Fodder

Some malevolent and lost soul attempted to shame Bill Murray Joe Biden and his son for being affectionate. Well, as the kids say, he got ratio’ed. But maybe he just posted the wrong photo. It happens. Maybe he meant to post this:

Or this:

Or this:

Raiders Of The Lost Yak

Along the India-China border, peace and cooperation breaks out and you may credit lost yaks for being responsible. A Chinese soldier, Capt. Wang Yalong (I know, sounds like a John Hughes foreign-exchange student) inadvertently crossed into India while helping local herdsmen search or a missing yak (how do yak go missing, you ask? They’re rather large).

Indian forces captured Capt. Wang, but instead of treating him with nefarious intent, they simply returned him to his outfit. Of course, this may have been a Chinese spy mission (dressed undercover as lost yaks), but the Indian army acted in good faith. After all, this is the country that invented karma.

No word on the status of the missing yaks.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Mookie Business

Is it too much to say that Game 1 of the World Series turned on a no-outs, 5th inning walk Tyler Glasnow yielded to Mookie Betts? The Dodgers’ five-tool stud stole second and third, then scored on a one-hopper to the first baseman (Take the out, Rays! Take the out!).

L.A.’s three studs showed up: Betts and Cody Bellinger both homered and Clayton Kershaw retired 17 of the last 18 batters he faced in the 8-3 win.

Pandemic Baseball Changes We Like: 1) Games every night, which means 2) The season ends before Halloween even though 3) Eight teams in each league made the postseason. Keep as much of this as possible, please.

One suggestion, and we’ve said this before: If MLB can play an entire 60-game season minus fans, why not start the first two weeks of the season in Florida and Arizona, at spring training sites? Let Opening Day be on the Ides of March. This way you can start the postseason a week earlier and be done before Halloween with 16 teams making the playoffs.

Me Tua Movement*

*The judges will not accept “Ahi Tua”

The Miami Dolphins announce that Tua Tagovailoa, the fifth overall draft pick last spring, will replace Ryan MisFitzpatrick as the starter. The Dolphins are 3-3 and Fitz, now in his 16th season after being the last of 14 quarterbacks selected in 2005, has the 7th-best QBR in the NFL.

That photo, above, represents a cool moment. After Tua was put into the game last Sunday versus the New York Jets in a Fish romp and completed his first NFL pass, he returned to the field postgame alone. One assumes he was thinking about how far he’d come in just 11 months after suffering a potential career-ending injury at Mississippi State. A very cool moment. Happy for him.

Lekki Massacre

Details remain scarce, but in Lagos, Nigeria, at the Lekki Tollgate, an unknown number of peaceful protesters were set up on by soldiers who cut them down with bullets. Many deaths. The #EndSARS protesters were assembling about the government’s poor response to its epidemic (any of this sound familiar?).

This is what happens when you empower a bad-faith government that abhors free speech and insists on “LAW AND ORDER” at all times. We’re really not that far away from Lagos… if the wrong man wins in less than two weeks.

By the way, check out the caption in this story and see if you cannot spot the irony…

Summers In Rangoon

By the way, if you’re on the Twitter and not following Rex Chapman (yes, the former hoops star), you’re missing out on great humor and humanity. That’s where we found this.

Which Biden Ad Do You Prefer?

This official one that candidate paid for and that aired during the World Series last night…

…or this one, property of The Simpsons a week or so back, that cost his campaign nothing?



Look closely and you’ll see one of the things that happened is “Served McDonald’s to the Clemson football team.”

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Mute Court*

*The judges will also accept “Polling Up” and “Jeffrey Tubin’ It”

The New Yorker has suspended writer Jeffrey Toobin and CNN put him on leave after he was allegedly caught masturbating on a Zoom call to discuss election night coverage. Toby was on a call with members of the mag and radio station WNYC when there was a pause to break into smaller groups. Toobin took a phone call that was the equivalent to a phone sex call and thought he’d muted the Zoom call. He had not.

Mic Drop*

*The judges will also accept “Mute Point” (kind of a theme this morning)

The final presidential debate, this Thursday, will be set up so that both candidates’ microphones will be muted during parts of the debate. Let’s just go ahead and refer to this as the “Donald Trump Rule.”

Saturday Night Disaster

For years, decades really, people have complained that “Saturday Night Live isn’t funny any more.” Well, they’re finally right.

Ever since the original cast (plus Bill Murray) departed after 1979 (or ’80), there’s always been someone to whine that the show is no longer funny. Even in the last 20 years you’d hear it despite the show having the talents of Tina Fey, Bill Hader, Kristen Witt and Kate McKinnon.

But in this season’s first two weeks, and with the election of a lifetime looming, the show has failed miserably. Let us count the ways: 1) We love Jim Carrey, but his Joe Biden is just his character from The Mask in white face. Jason Sudeikis‘ Joe Biden was always the best version and even though he’s now Ted Lasso, they should beg him to return. 2) The Weekend Update guys, usually the most reliable part of the show, have been lame. In Week 1 Colin Jost ended at least two jokes with “I’m just sayin’,” which is not how a pro ends a joke. Michael Che had one good joke about “police in Ohio say that report of a homeless man sleeping on a bench turned out to be a statue, which is a huge relief because they shot it 15 times.” Now that was funny. Not enough jokes like that.

3) The worst aspect of the show is how many skits seem to address political correctness or the lack thereof. We’ve tuned in to a skit about a mafia don whose crew was correcting him about his slurs and a group of friends, mostly black, riffing on Lovecraft Country. You can make any subject funny or not, so it’s not just about what they’re tackling. It’s more, to us, about how they’re tackling it. 4) Let’s not even discuss Bill Burr’s monologue from a couple weeks back.

We’ll say it again: Lorne Michaels desperately needs to hire John Mulaney as the show’s head writer. Back up the Brinks truck.

Dreams? She’s on the Case

Thanks to a TikTok ad, Fleetwood Mac’s 1975 classic “Dreams” was the 2nd-most downloaded song last week. So leave it to Andie Case (and her two male accompanists) to swiftly record a cover of the tune. She’s got a very Stevie Nicks-y voice, after all.

A reminder that Rumours included the following tracks besides this: “Don’t Stop”, “Go Your Own Way,” “Second-Hand News,” “The Chain,” “I Don’t Want To Know,” “You Make Loving Fun” and “Never Going Back Again.” People on Twitter have recently, seriously, asked if this is a good album. The answer is, This may be the BEST album.

By the way, this was the band’s ELEVENTH studio album. It took a few tries to achieve perfection. And just so you know, the previous album, simply titled Fleetwood Mac, included “Landslide,” “Rhiannon,” “Over My Head,” and “Say You Love Me.” They were already pretty close to perfection.

True Genius

Some junior high student is going to see this tweet and win his school’s science fair. And we’re all for it.

Rule No. 2: He ALWAYS Accuses His Enemies of Being Exactly What He Is (Doing)

We’ve covered the President Trump rules before: 1) Always be lying, 2) If you’re doing it or being it, accuse your nemesis of being/doing exactly that thing, 3) Always use superlatives, 4) Deflect all accusations with argument that they’re lying (which is sort of a combo of Nos. 1 and 2).

I’m sure there are more, we’re just not in the mood to to explore them at the moment (we’ve been so happy of late). Anyway, referring to Dr. Fauci as “an idiot” is the ultimate expression of Rule No. 2 here. Just worth noting that once upon a time there was another Italian scientist whom the ruling powers attempted to discredit. His name was Galileo. We all know how that worked out.

If you saw Dr. Fauci on 60 Minutes Sunday, you know that he’s now doing his daily walks with bodyguards. What a sad state of affairs when the person who has devoted his life to stopping the one thing that is killing so many Americans this year has his own life in danger because he’s simply super-spreading the truth.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Seven Up

We waited about seven seconds after realizing that Aaron Sorkin’s The Trial Of The Chicago 7 was streaming on Netflix to press Play. Well worth it. We didn’t know anything about the trial or the principals other than their names and that it had to do with riots in Chicago in the summer of 1968.

So it was educational. And disturbing. And, yes, depressing, because look how little we’ve changed.

But what a cast: Eddie Redmayne (Oscar-winner), Michael Keaton (ibid), Mark Rylance (op cit), Sacha Baron Cohen, Frank Langella, Ben Shenkman, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Jeremy Strong (The Big Short) and John Carroll Lynch (Fargo, Zodiac). And, of course, it’s Sorkin and a court room and you don’t need to know anything more than “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!” to know how that goes.

We’ve hardly seen any new movies this year—nor have you—but this and 1917 are our two favorites.

Tampa Bay Watch

A great weekend in sports for those denizens on the Gulf Coast. The Rays avoid being forever wearing the goat (small letters) label by not blowing that 3-0 lead to the Astros and winning Game 7. And the Bucs take down the undefeated Green Bay Packers with stunning ease. That Tom Brady kid has a future in this league.

The Rays will take on the Los Angeles Dodgers in Arlington beginning Tuesday. It’s a ballpark that has never hosted a regular season game but is about to host a World Series.

Wanna know the oldest ballpark in baseball to have never hosted a World Series game (this will depress you)? Oriole Park at Camden Yards.

Take Us To New Zealand, Please

George Carlin Meets John Stewart

Take a good 12 minutes to listen to George Carlin giving thoughtful answers to a young John Stewart. Stick around toward the end when he talks about how much he loves people as individuals but despises them in groups. George was on to something here.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Astro-Logy

Does anyone else feel the way I do: the Astros, the sports franchise that best examplifies the Trump era, trailed the Rays 3-0 in the ALCS. But after a walk-off home run last night by Carlos Correo, Houston is now only down 3-2.

So, yes, I recognize that Joe Biden is way ahead in the polls, but as long as the Astros remain alive in baseball this month, I still fear there’s a chance Trump can win. If the Astros lose, I’ll begin to feel as if the world’s karmic balance is beginning to right itself. Anyone else feel this way?

Savannah Trumps Donald

Someone was certainly paying attention during mock trial in law school. NBC’s Savannah Guthrie grilled the president as if she were Katie Porter in their “town hall” on Tuesday night and did such a fabulous job that she almost redeemed Kabletown for deciding to air it contemporaneously with the Joe Biden town hall on ABC.

It’s funny, and I’m not botanist, but I think that when you drain a swamp what you’re pretty much left with is a savannah.

Three-Word Review of Matthew McConaughey’s Memoir

Who knew when he was explaining the reason why, as Wooderson, he still loves teenage girls as an aging 20-someting in Dazed and Confused that Matthew McConaughey would turn out quite as big as he did? Or, like Brad Pitt in Thelma and Louise, did the charisma just jump off the screen at you even in that cameo appearance (we’ll vote the latter).

The Oscar-winner whose finest moments for us will always be as Rust Cohle has a memoir out, Greenlights. We’d buy it, but we’re just going to ask to buy Katie McCollow’s copy when she finishes reading it. Although, on second thought, buy the audiobook and drive aimlessly in my Lincoln Continental with a dog or two listening to it in full.

Iowa Caucus

A senate debate in Iowa went as viral as such a thing possibly can when the challenger, Theresa Greenfield (Dem… and, if your name is “Greenfield” in Io-way, you better know your agriculture), was able to accurately answer the “break-even price” of corn. Then the incumbent, Republican Joni Ernst was unable to duplicate the feat with soybeans.

Debates are so much more fun when they are structured like quiz shows. More of this, please!

Animals, Always and Forever

This photo of a tiger in Siberia won National Geographic‘s “Wildlife Photograph Of The Year” award. As much as we adore tigers and the idea that there are still vast uninhabited spaces in Russia and China for wildlife to thrive, this wasn’t even close to the most impactful photo in their gallery. Take a look and decide for yourself.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

The Covid-19 19

After losing at Texas A&M last weekend in front of a somewhat well-occupied Kyle Field, Florida coach Dan Mullen yearned to “pack the Swamp” for this Saturday’s home game versus LSU. Then 19 Gators tested positive.

Now what? Life comes at you pretty fast. Only two weeks ago Mullen was talking about how he required a good bottle of wine from the Ol’ Ball Coach after putting up 640 offensive yards at Ole Miss. Now? Is the game canceled this Saturday?

From Anchorage To Athens

Here’s the type of tale just made for cable news: the 58 year-old mayor of Anchorage, Alaska, Ethan Berkowitz, has resigned after admitting to an “inappropriate relationship” with local TV reporter Maria Athens.

This is very messy. Athens was arrested for threatening Berkowitz and then she went online and said she was going to out him for posting nude photos on an underage website. Then Athens posted a pic of what is purported to be Berkowitz’s bare backside.

Anchorage is Alaska’s largest city. And Athens is it angriest citizen this week.

Home On Deranged

Our favorite TV personality, Ben Mankiewicz of TCM, launched a hashtag challenge last night of #ShittyWesterns with “The Researchers.” We came back with “The Man Who Shot Liberty Mutual.”

Then we checked out what others had conjured. Here goes: “The In-Law Josey Wales,” “Jeremiah’s Johnson,” “The Skidmark of Zorro,” “The Magnificent 7-11,” “Slap Fight at the O.K. Corral,” “Stagemom,” and “Support Your Local Sharif.”

Mankiewicz, by the way, will make a cameo in this year’s Simpsons Halloween “Treehouse of Horror” episode.

What Ever Happened To Carol Wayne?

Last night we had occasion to recall the genius of Johnny Carson’s Art Fern character. That’s buxom actress Carol Wayne with him. Wayne was outstanding at playing the ditzy and oblivious sidekick.

So we wondered what ever happened to her. Turns out Wayne, just one year after this 1984 taping, died mysteriously at a beach resort in Mexico. She had had a loud argument with her male companion, Edward Durston, shortly after arrival. Oddly, Wayne’s body was found four days after she disappeared and three days after Durston departed. Funny that he didn’t stick around.

Durston, a used car salesman (really) and B-movie producer, was never charged in the death of Wayne—the coroner ruled it accidental. Nor was he charged in the death of Diane Linkletter (daughter of Art), 20, who fell to her death from the balcony of a 6-story building in L.A. Durston was with her and said he tried to grab her as she fell. Hmmm.

Durston also produced a 1970 horror fest called I Drink Your Blood, which was the first film to receive an X rating for violence.

IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

by John Walters

Tweet Me Right

Voter Suppression = Oppression

On the first day of early voting in some parts of Georgia, voters waited more than five hours to cast their ballots. In some parts.

In predominantly white and upper-class Buckhead, though, voters waited up to 15 minutes to cast their ballots.

Meanwhile in Texas, they’re suppressing votes by limiting counties to one mail-in voting box per county.

While in Virginia… I wonder if “accidentally” is an accurate term here.

Things that make you go hmmm….

One Flew Over The Cabbie’s Nest

(Lloyd, seated behind Nicholson)

Last week we watched One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest on Netflix. If you have not seen the 1975 film that stars Jack Nicholson, a reminder that it takes place (and was filmed at) in an Oregon mental hospital in which Randall P. McMurphy (Jack Nicholson) plays a sane criminal who gets himself dropped into a loony bin. His nemesis is Nurse Ratched (Louise Fletcher) who controls the ward with passive-aggressive domination.

Three notes: 1) This was the first movie since It Happened One Night (1934) to do the five Oscar sweep: Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Screenplay.

(Martini [Devito])

2) This was the first of three iconic films that were filmed in Oregon in the 1970s. The other two? Animal House and The Shining (which also starred Nicholson).

3) A savvy viewer of sitcoms will note that Danny Devito and Christopher Lloyd (his first film) play two of the patients in McMurphy’s sphere. And our first thought was, How cool that they would both go on to star in Taxi. And then we thought about it a little more and had the penultimate epiphany: Taxi is One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest!

Think about it: Mean-spirited dispatcher Louie DePalma stands protected behind a cage prodding and provoking the cabbies. His decisions affect their welfare. Alex Rieger (Judd Hirsch) is the sane McMurphy character dropped into the loony bin who spars often with Louie. The rest of the cast sits around and plays cards and some are highly mentally unbalanced: Latka, Reverend Jim (Lloyd) and Tony (Tony Danza), particularly.

Has anyone made this connection before?

Jim Brown Vs. Lester Maddox

We went down a YouTube wormhole late last night and found a 1970 episode of The Dick Cavett Show in which the guests were retired NFL superstar Jim Brown (I think some would now refer to him as a “social justice warrior”) and Georgia governor Lester Maddox. You must watch these clips.

Note how Brown keeps brushing at his pant leg as a way of maintaining his calm. It’s like a post-hypnotic suggestion. Note when Maddox basically originates the “All Lives Matter” rejoinder. Note how often Maddox interrupts both Brown and Cavett. Note how, in the first segment, Cavett recognizes that this is cracklin’ good television and lets the two combatants slug it out themselves, remaining silent for minutes on end.

Slayer Pete

He will be our president some day


If you recall back last winter, Mayor Pete Buttigieg was always our choice as the Democratic nominee. He was the smartest candidate, he had the most impressive resume (Harvard and an actual Rhodes Scholar, Ms. McEnany, plus a stint in the military… he volunteered) and he would have been the most confounding opponent for Donald Trump to debate.

In a profile story today, the Los Angeles Times refers to him as “Slayer Pete” and notes that he “walks softly and carries a sling blade.” Well done.

Last week we noted how Mayor Pete just destroyed Fox News hosts on two separate occasions. Here he is again, destroying the semi-informed on the topic of late-term abortions:

Burr-ning Down The House

I can’t remember the last time, if ever, that a Saturday Night Live host probably would have been better off just leaving 30 Rock after the monologue. There may not be a more palm-of-your-hands audience than the one that an SNL host meets, but somehow comedian Bill Burr managed to alienate most of them in seven short minutes. Wow.

Listen, if something is funny, I don’t care whom it offends. And some of this was funny. The months thing at the end, while not entirely original, is somewhat funny. But man, the verbal assault on white women… Wow. Listen for yourselves if you have not yet heard it.