by John Walters

Farewell, Omar

If you’ve never watched The Wire (HBO), that’s something in your life you need to change immediately. If you have, then you know what an unforgettable character Omar is. Last Sunday Michael K. Williams, the man who played Omar (as well as other memorable characters on Boardwalk Empire and The Night Of), was found dead in his Williamsburg, Brooklyn, apartment. Apparently of a heroin overdose.

It was Omar who famously said, “You come at the king, you better not miss.” Omar was an inspired character, a fearless, trenchcoat-wearing, bad mamajamma who stole from drug dealers. You don’t do that. He was like a phantom; they feared him because he seemed to just disappear into the shadows. The character was also gay, which just added to the uniqueness of Omar.

Williams was also phenomenal in The Night Of. He sorta reminds me of the black Phillip Seymour Hoffman. A gifted actor who owned every scene in which he appeared and then died, alone, of a drug overdose, in New York City. Williams was 54.

Teenage Dream

Raducanu has come from nowhere, or London, to charm the tennis world

The “women’s” singles final at the U.S. Open will feature two fetching, charming teenagers from friendly nations: Laylah Fernandez of Canada, who turned 19 earlier this week, and Emma Raducanu of Great Britain, who is 19.

Fernandez is ranked 73rd in the world; Raducanu, 150th. Needless to say, it’s the first Grand Slam final for either young lady. It’s also the first U.S. Open final between two teenagers since Serena Williams defeated Martina Hingis in 1999.


On one side of the coin, you’ve gotta give John Mulaney credit for appearing on his close friend Seth Meyers’ show and being so forthcoming. This was cracklin’ good television.

On the other, the veneer of our Catholic school nerdy boy man is now off. Some of Mulaney’s best bits (“You buy the cow”) now come off as, if not phony, then at least not standing the test of time. Nobody’s perfect, of course, but comedians are supposed to use their lives as material for their sets. In so many ways, Mulaney was hiding his. All those hours he spent serving as the responsible big brother to Pete Davidson to keep him off the wayward path? Who was shepherding whom?

And I know I sound a little like a jilted lover—or Mulaney’s ex-wife, who has kept her dignity throughout this awful stretch—but it sure sounded weird to hear Meyers congratulate his good friend for becoming a dad to-be. In the past year Mulaney has left his wife, gone into rehab twice, gone totally Hollywood by hooking up with a B-list celeb (Olivia Munn) who’s dated a Hall of Fame quarterback (Aaron Rodgers), and now impregnated her.

You have to wonder if Mulaney got the Rodgers Rate there…

Life is messy. And you hope better days are ahead for this man whose ceiling is higher than anyone of his generation. But remember that character he played in the classic SNL game show skit, “What’s That Name?” He doesn’t come off too much better in person right now.

Just The Vax, Ma’am

President Biden steals a page from Texas Gov. Abbott’s playbook. You wanna hand out a $10,000 punishment for aiding and abetting an abortion? Here’s a $12,000 punishment for working for a company of more than 1,000 employees and not getting vaccinated. I pity the unvaccinated Uber driver in Plano who drives an expectant mother to the clinic. That’s a $22,000 bill right there.

Biden noted in his speech that “even Fox News” has a vaccination policy for its employees. I wonder if that snippet made it onto Fox News… or OAN… or NewsMax.

Go, go, Joseph/You know what they say…

The Bucs Start Here

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, last seen winning the Super Bowl in their own stadium, kicked off the NFL season last night by hosting America’s Team. And Tom Brady’s charmed life just continues as they eked out a 31-29 win with the help of an uncalled offensive pass interference that would have negated the final, field-goal winning drive.

Odd. Tom Brady being helped out by the zebras in a game-winning drive. Has that ever happened?


by John Walters

Remember The Amnio!*

*The judges will also accept “The Elephant In The Womb” and “Fetal Positions”

The abortion issue is a simple question of the lesser of two evils. Is it right to abort a pregnancy and put a fetus to death unnaturally? No. Is it good to saddle a woman with a pregnancy and a total overhaul of her life because of an unwanted pregnancy, particularly if the sex was non-consensual? Given that choice, you decide what the lesser of two evils is.

Of course, the Texas legislature and the U.S. Supreme Court, by a 5-4 vote, decided that the latter is the lesser of the two evils. But let’s be frank here: Keeping women in the kitchen and at home raising babies and out of positions of economic power much less government is the real goal here. Particularly poor and middle-class ones.

That SCOTUS allowed a law to stand that encourages other Texans to snitch on anyone remotely associated with an abortion and make money off it ($10,000!) is straight-up Dark Ages behavior. Even if someone is innocent, they’re going to have to pay a lawyer to defend them and they won’t be able to recover that court cost.

Will abortions in Texas (and other red states soon to feel emboldened on this reversal of Roe V. Wade) cease? No, they’ll just happen clandestinely and in unsafe fashion. Anyone ever see In The Heat Of The Night? Yup, that.

The staff here at MH encourages all women of child-bearing age to flee Texas forthwith. And what, then, will the men of Texas do for, um, satisfaction? Well, they can do what many of us have been telling Texas to do for years now: Go f*ck themselves.*

*And before one of my most loyal readers lectures me on Christianity and how wrong it is to take a life, I’ll remind him that pro-lifers seem to care a lot more about the lives of unborn babies than they do of children and adults. When they begin to show me that they give the slightest sh*t about those who are already born and poor and hungry and homeless, I’ll begin to feel their sincerity about cute unborn babies.

Stupid Human Tricks


Or this?

The MH staff thinks trickster No. 1 is much further down the Darwinian ladder….