by John Walters

A Medium Happy 21st to Andrew Wiggins….


…a Medium Happy 20th to D’Angelo Russell.

Starting Five

Give ’em hell, Tim

1. Apple Core Beliefs

A long, long time ago, Eve took a bite out of the apple. And now the FBI wants to do the same.

People: 9/11 could have been easily prevented. More than a few astute, insightful FBI investigators filed reports to their superiors about Arabs taking flying lessons in different parts of the USA. But here’s the problem: nobody listened. Because nobody wanted to upset the status quo.

Fifteen years later, you’re telling us that it’s worth compromising a company’s ethos (not just any company, but the world’s most successful company, which happens to be based in the U.S.) so that the FBI, which has no clue if there is any real information in this dead mass murderer’s phone, can suss out if there may be a terrorist attack on the horizon? And not just a company’s integrity, but also that of the U.S. Constitution?

What ever happened to all that, “If we change the way we live, the terrorists have won” rhetoric?

Last thing: the same Justice Department that couldn’t find the evidence or will to lock up a single Wall Street banker after 2008-09 now has the will to break the law in order to keep us safe? Thanks, but no thanks. Do your jobs. And this time, listen to your agents in the field.

2. Hoboken Squat Cobbler

Really, now, would he make something like this up?

Jimmy gotta be Jimmy. What our hero in Santa Fe is quickly discovering is that the partner-track world is lucrative but also zzzzzzzz. Especially if you don’t bring your acoustic guitar to the office. So he takes a side job because, let’s face it, Jimmy McGill not conning people is like Chuck McGill visiting Best Buy.

Here’s the back story of how the term evolved, and why there may not be as many pies at your local bakery this weekend.

3. Definitely Mabrey

Meet the Mabrey sisters of Belmar, N.J. (Yes, that’s where Jersey Shore takes place) and Notre Dame. Michaela (23), a senior, buried three pointers in last night’s 73-66 win at No. 2 Florida State, while Marina (3), a freshman, also made three pointers in the game.

Michaela is a starter while Marina is the first or second player off the bench.

FOB (Friend of Blog) Ken Fowler points out that since the beginning of the 2013-14 season, the Fighting Irish are now 99-1 versus all teams not named UConn. They have more losses in national championship games versus the Huskies (2) in that span than they do against the entire rest of their schedule (lone non-UConn defeat was last year at Miami).

4. “Where’s Roscoe?!?”

Here in New York City, we have a famous and beloved bed bug-fighting pooch. Apparently he has no equal in the Dust Bowl state, as Kyrie Irving was forced to miss Cleveland’s game at OKC at Sunday because of bed bug bites (Cleveland still won, 115-92). The hotel was the Skirvin Hilton, which is reputed to be haunted by a maid who committed suicide years ago.

Either way, we mention all of this mainly so we can provide Stephen Douglas’ (of The Big Lead worldwide renown) tweet: “In a show of solidarity with the basketball team, the hotels in OKC never have more than 2-stars.”

5. “And Your Coming Back To Me/Is Apparently NOT Against All Odds…”

Take a look at me now, Phil says

Eighties pop song genius Phil Collins and ex-wife Orianne, who divorced in 2008 and set a British alimony record at $46.7 million, are apparently headed back to the altar. She is not an easy lover, but something happened on the way to heaven.

Music 101

Hit Me With Your Best Shot

The first single from Pat Benatar, who was born Patricia Andrzejewski in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. Which is where Girls is now set. If Hannah and the gals had been around in 1980, they’d have been listening to this hit when it reached No. 9.

Remote Patrol

Champions League: Arsenal vs FC Barcelona

2:30 p.m. FS1

No one has told Ozil that he can’t really fly.

Forget what the cable news shows say: TODAY is Super Tuesday. The Champions League does not really begin until the Round of 16, and today’s first match features defending champs FC Barcelona (Messi, Luis Suarez, Neymar) at Arsenal at Emirates Stadium in London. The Gunners are currently in third place in the Premier League with Mesut Ozil and Olivier Giroud.

5. Models Only 

And this ISN’T televised?

Welcome to the 7th annual LeSutra Model Volleyball Tournament in, of course, Miami Beach. Coed teams from Miami’s hottest modeling agencies hit the sand last weekend for a tournament and I honestly can’t understand how neither ESPN2 or FS1 got their grubby little fingers on the TV rights. We don’t know who won. And we don’t care.

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