by John Walters

Starting Five

When you bring a cheese grater to a knife fight…

Wet, Wet, Wet

Congratulations, Harvey! No single storm has ever dumped more rain—52 inches—in one area. At least 11 people are dead and well, there’s going to be quite a plethora of mud for a fortnight or so.


(Look at us! We made MH! Proud!)


Meanwhile, the president flew to Corpus Christi and then Austin, where he never spoke to a single resident outside of the governor, and cautioned that the two of them should probably not congratulate one another on how they have handled this epic storm until later. Courage, friend.


This, above, is what it’s ALL about. Below, this man tells it like it is.




2. Monsoon Wetting*

*The judges are already sorry

Even though it’s garnering almost zero cable news attention (because we Americans are so self-absorbed), the flooding in south Asia has claimed at least 1,000 lives. The Indian megalopolis of Mumbai has been particularly hard-hit, but chances are the BYU-LSU game will probably be moved there anyway. This New York Times piece provides excellent reportage.

3. Kneel And Be Counted

Our friends at Sports Illustrated put out four regional covers featuring three NFL household names (Tom Brady, Aaron Rodgers and real-life flood hero T.J. Watt) and one NFL Fantasy hero (David Johnson). The concept of other NFL players as Lilliputians compared to this quartet of Gullivers was inspired, but there may be a slight chance that consumers will notice that all four players, three of whom are Hall of Fame locks, are kneeling.

And you know, there’s a certain quarterback currently not on a roster who overshadows all of them in terms of attention right now who is famous for kneeling.

SI says it was not trying to make a statement. I believe them. But is it really that strange for readers to infer that a statement was being made?

4. The Trouble With Print Journalism

Bil Nack, one of the best there’s ever been. Nack doesn’t believe in writer’s block; he just believes you need to report the story more thoroughly.

As often happens, our most inspired ideas/thoughts come while we are in the shower (which is why we’re always running low on shampoo). Anyway, here was/were yesterday’s…


It’s really that simple and yes, we apologize for now posting two of our tweets in one post. Bosses/managing editors no longer insist on a story being thoroughly reported or meticulously written; they, for the most part, care about your SEO-headline and how many clicks the piece receives (“Kardashians Meet Brain-Eating Zombie at Katy Perry Concert!!!”).


Another HUGE and sorry development, as tweeted out by my friend/colleague/and fellow Arizonan Lisa Olson (in response): at some point editors started being called PRODUCERS. Where once editors were older, wiser, more experienced and bitter and crotchety former writers (i.e., yours truly, present day), today they are underpaid millennials whose primary job is to grab the content, get a photo from Reuters or Getty, and post that sh*znit as soon as possible. The majority of them don’t even line-read your story (it’s amazing the errors you’ll see, and I’ve often been tempted to throw in a completely Jabberwocky line simply to see if anyone was paying attention or reading).

5. Down Goes Kerber

Another day at the U.S. Open, another major loss. On Monday No. 2 women’s seed Simona Halep lost to Maria Sharapova. Last night defending women’s champion Angelique Kerber, the No. 6 seed, lost in straight sets to unseeded Naomi Osaka. It’s looking better for both thirty somethings, Venus and Maria, but No. 1 seed Karolina Pliskova looked dominant as well, dropping just three games as she won in straight sets.

Music 101

Feeling Stronger Every Day

At its core, Chicago were just a group of nerdy and extremely talented musicians, a superior version of Counting Crows or Dave Matthews Band. It’s long been our belief that the music of Chicago would make for a PERFECT Broadway play and when it eventually happens, just remember that Medium Happy had the idea but not the rights. This song made it to No. 10 in 1973. The bar was set much, much higher back then.

A Word, Please

halcyon (adj.)

denoting a period of time in the past that was idyllically happy and peaceful



5 thoughts on “IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

  1. Saw you posted a new Blown Coverage podcast! Looking forward to listening to it on the drive home. You should try to get some sponsors – monetize that bad boy with an awkward “live read” or something.


    Regarding your reply my to climate change comment yesterday: Just to be clear, I’m a God-fearing, educated Christian, but I do believe the global climate is changing. Though, I disagree that it’s entirely human caused. Given that the world has historically gone through climate changes before major pollution-generating inventions were conceived (the Ice Age predates the internal combustion engine, for example), I can’t believe it’s just humans driving gas guzzling pick up trucks that’s to blame.

    Moving on from what many (including our esteemed author/editor/best waiter east of the Mississippi) would consider an uninformed, backwoods argument, my question is this: What would you have us humans (and I mean globally, not just the U.S.) do starting today to reverse the climate change? Or do you think it’s too late?

    • I don’t think it’s too late, but I do think there’s already been some irreversible damage. This may not be the best analogy, but here goes. You’re stranded in the ocean and you’re thirsty. That sip of ocean water provides momentary succor, but ultimately it only hastens your death and/or diminishes chances of survival.

      There are multiple avenues of clean, renewable energy that will also provide jobs and stimulate the economy. The only big problem is that the current men of enormous wealth, who dictate who gets elected and how the great unwashed think, don’t want to lose their power. So they try to fool everyone into thinking that only “elites” believe in climate change, as if it is some pagan god. It’s not. It’s real. And we can curb it if we stop burning carbon-based fuels.

  2. Question(s) – back in the late 90s or whenever it was when the internet had moved beyond AOL, did you foresee what has happened to “print journalism”? I actually thought it would mean writers would be even MORE important as “content would be king (or queen)” and all those countless websites would be clamoring & competing for skilled writers. Perhaps I’m just naïve (or stoopid) but I keep thinking that QUALITY (or heck, even accuracy) will eventually once again beat QUANTITY. What do you think?

    And if you had known what was coming, would you have gone to med/law school or just continued with your journalistic dream? I am selfishly happy you chose as you did but wonder if you wish you could go back in time & change things.

    So, a wall-clamoring idiot visited hurricane-drenched Houston yesterday – You’re a bartender now, is that a Harvey Wallbanger? 😉

    • Susie B.

      I was not smart enough to foresee the future. I’m barely smart enough to see the present.

      As for careers, no reason I cannot go to law or med school now. Although I’d probably have to hand this site over to Jacob/Jason Antsey if I did. As to whether I wish I could pull a Cher and “turn back time,” I’ll quote Dr. Pangloss: “All is for the best in the best of all possible worlds.” Besides, I had a fun half-hour conversation with Bob Costas yesterday, lunch with Bob Roe and drinks with Adam Duerson. All while riding my bike around New York City. I’m the luckiest person I know.

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