by John Walters

While putting together this morning’s blog at a Starbucks, this MH staffer looked down at a crowded table and noticed his beverage was missing. After a few furtive glances and gestures by the staffer, a lady seated next to him fessed up: “I thought that was mine and drank from it, then returned it to the counter because it’s not what I ordered.” She got us another one, but said, “I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.”

Only in New York, kids. Only in New York.

Starting Five

The Gang’s All Here

If you’ve never attended a funeral or wedding where there was someone you distinctly meant to avoid, you probably will some day. It’s nice to know that even those who’ve occupied the highest office in the land—or their spouses—had to deal with the same thing Wednesday at George H.W. Bush‘s funeral.

Not in the shot and to the right of Hillary: The 39th president, Jimmy Carter, and his wife, Roslyn. They’re going to outlive everyone, aren’t they?

Here’s Jon Meacham‘s eulogy. Thirteen-plus minutes well-spent.

2. Unwelcome To The Jungle

A two and a half-hour theatrical production set inside an Afghani restaurant situated in the midst of a Middle Eastern refugee camp located in Calais, France. Sound entertaining? The Jungle, which won five-star reviews in London (the play was first performed in the camp itself, which French officials have since bulldozed, has just come ashore here in the U.S.

The Jungle, from above

It’s not a musical, so it won’t garner Hamilton-level love, but trust us, you will be hearing a lot about this show. It has an energy to it similar to what the original cast did with Rent. 

3. Arresting Development

“We’re taking it up a notch!”

In Canada Meng Wanzhou, the CFO of Chinese tech giant Huawei and the daughter of its founder, is arrested and faces extradition to the United States. Forget last Saturday night’s kumbaya-meets-bok choy dinner in Buenos Aires.

The charges are not being released, but the funny part is that Meng was actually apprehended in Vancouver last Saturday, at about the same time the dinner was taking place. Shades of The Godfather baptismal scene, no? Settling family debts.

The MH staff wants to go on record to say that no matter our distaste for 45 the person, we  support the tough tactics with China. If you’re ever going to go after them, you do so when the economy is at its most robust. And they’re not exactly playing fair, either.

Meanwhile, if you are an American businessman, especially a somewhat visible one, you may not want to travel to China for awhile.

4. This Camel’s Back

Two years ago, Campbell’s 5’9″ guard Chris Clemons finished second in the nation in scoring (25.1 ppg). Last season, as a junior, he finished fourth (24.9), which included a career-high 51-point game. Thus far this season, he’s leading the nation at 31.4 ppg.

It’s early, of course, but the tiny Fighting Camel can score. At this level. What will happen to him next June? Will any NBA take a flier on the next Isaiah Thomas (who was already the next Isaiah Thomas?).

You won’t see his name on any NBA mock draft lists. Overlooked or over-achieving?

5. Emissions Impossible*

*The judges will also accept “C-uh-O2”

Yesterday scientists projected that global emissions of carbon dioxide are proceeding at a record pace. After flat-lining from 2014 to 2016, emissions of CO2 rose 1.6% last year and 2.7% this year. This will lead to the ice caps melting, to seas rising, to tens of millions of humans being forced to relocate (and we’re sure that will go peacefully) and to the extinction of numerous species (alas, not ours, not soon enough).

Anyway, it may be time to move to the Northwest Territories. What’s the job prospects for moderately talented bloggers in that part of the world?

Music 101

Summer, Highland Falls

Is this the most beautiful Billy Joel song? I won’t fight you on it if you think so. I won’t fight you on it if you don’t think so, either. I’m too old to fight. Or to do kamikaze shots after midnight. Where were we again? See, that’s how old I am, I can’t even retain my train of thought. This is off Joel’s fourth studio album, Turnstiles (the album cover above is from the Astor Place station of the 4/6 train), which was released in 1976. His next album would be the monster that propelled him to international stardom. Who gets four albums any more with a record company that will have the patience to bank on you that the fifth will be the breakthrough?

Remote Patrol

3 thoughts on “IT’S ALL HAPPENING!

  1. I got my answer about the “tanking or no” before the market officially opened this morning…”There she blows!” The DOW has been down over 750 so far today & it’s even money if it closes up or down from there.

    You know what kills me about the financial yakkers on TV? And the writers? They are ALWAYS BEHIND what’s happening RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM. They STILL keep asking “IF” we’ll go into a bear market! IF?! IF?! We went into a bear market Oct 5th & it just keeps getting grizzlier & grizzlier. The only question is how long before the next recession takes over. Before or after The Sociopath is OUSTED?

    And really, you LIKE TARRIFS? You’re saying you too are a, cough, spit, “Tariff Man”? You LIKE PAYING more money for EVERYTHING? I know, I know, “you don’t buy anything”. Well, you gotta live, your roomie/cat’s gotta eat, that takes money. And it will take MORE money with the effect of tariffs on countless industries & items. My area of expertise was not economic history but I’m pretty sure the implementation of tariffs have always ended badly for the USA in the long run.


    • There may be a lot of this I don’t understand, Susie B., so I’ll defer to experts. It sounds as is China gets away with a lot of dirty pool outside the fact that they have a larger workforce willing (or even unwilling) to work for less while also doing nothing about environmental concerns. Intellectual property theft, for one thing. Not a fan of tariffs, but that sounds as if it’s the only way they’ll take notice.

      If there’s something about this you can explain to me, I’m all ears.

  2. Oh, & I checked the NBA standings today for the 1st time this season since it’s almost a third (!) of the way done & the Lakers (yuck!) & the Supervillains (double yuck!) both have the same # of losses?! One is currently 5th & the other 4th in the standings. And the Nuggets & Clippers are both ahead of them. Didn’t see THAT coming! I assume now that Steph’s back & if Durant can keep his mouth shut & his mind on his OWN team, they will rise to the top eventually. Meanwhile, the much-ballyhooed Celtics who, pre-season, were tagged as the Eastern Conference team that would be in the Finals (now that LBJ is gone) is currently 5th in their conference?!

    I’ll be honest, I miss watching the NBA vey much but there’s just not a team I want to watch let alone root for. The Cavs disintegrated after game 4 when Kev’s injured toe was going to need surgery. They then fire the HC 2 games later because he actually wanted to play the veterans & win some games?! And now they’ve traded away Korver & put JR on ice until some other team will take him. I think the Cavs LIED to everyone, especially Kevin Love.

    I guess I’ll be writing even more here about figure skating & skiing! Hey, did you see that Mikaela Shiffrin won her 1st SG up at Lake Louise, Canada on Sunday? She was fabulous! The commentators didn’t seem to realize how great she was skiing till she went across the Finish Line despite my screaming at the TV. 🙂 And Lindsey has postponed her retirement so she can ski that venue once again next year (she was injured in training a few weeks ago & couldn’t ski there this past weekend, which would have been her 1st races of the season. I think I was as devastated to get the news as she!).

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