YOU’RE SLIPPIN’, JIMMY
Justice Matters Most?
Just Make Money.
It’s incredible what the writers of Better Call Saul do. Is it a master plan that they’ve had in place that allows them to come up with things such as they did in last night’s episode, for example, using Jimmy McGill’s initials on his briefcase to demonstrate his transformation to the dark side? Or, even better, to illustrate that metamorphosis by having him go off on Howard Hamlin in the episode’s final scene exactly like he did the very first time we saw them together, only that this time Jimmy’s not goofing when he goes all Ned Beatty in Network on Howard? This time he’s sincere?
And even that shot above, where we see him contemplating his total abandonment of scruples in favor of fame and fortune? Astounding. Seriously, how do the writers do it? Has it all been blocked out from before Season 1 or are they just very good at thinking on their feet and using what has come before? It looks so seamless.
As for Jimmy, we’ve finally lost him completely to Saul. As I wrote last week, there was always a Robin Hood aspect to him in the past. Sure, he took short cuts and flat-out committed fraud, but it was always to help the little guy, be it little old ladies in nursing homes or Kim Wexler. When he and Giselle would scam a d-bag at a bar, they never actually cashed the check.
That’s over now. Jimmy just committed fraud in a courtroom (not a single reporter in court for a high-profile murder in Albuquerque? I don’t think so) in order to get a cartel member out on bail. And Howard, who we told you wasn’t that dumb, just called him on his bullsh*t. And both Howard and Jimmy know that Howard didn’t kill Chuck; Jimmy killed Chuck, if anyone did.
S’all good? Hardly.
No Poop For You
We love the idea of Larry David’s spite store, “Latte Larry’s,” recusing itself from having defecation facilities. What we don’t understand is how Mr. David (unless he did so in the season finale, which we have yet to watch) failed to have some fun with arguably the most renowned catchphrase in Seinfeld history by making a “No poop for you!” reference. Maybe a sign outside the restrooms?
*The judges will also accept “Geyser Will Helm”
Wondering if the toilet paper shortage (Mike Huckabee suggests a corn cob, Susie B.) will persuade Americans to finally fall in love with the bidet. Invented in France in the 17th century—there is no known single inventor; no one wants to take credit for it—the torrent of water module has never caught on here in America. But maybe now? To paraphrase a line from scripture, “Love your enemas as yourself.”
We thought about some of the comments on Friday’s item, about how most people didn’t have capital available after 2008-2009 to invest in the stock market and pull themselves back up. Here’s what we think: most people, and this may just be intentional by the (mostly) men who populate Wall Street, are intimidated by the stock market and never bother to learn it.
In the past decade I’ve worked with dozens of people who are incredibly hard workers but don’t have an advanced degree. Many don’t have a college degree. And almost none of them are in the stock market. Now, I know plenty of them (and this applies particularly to sports writers) who know their way around a gambler’s den—parlays, over/unders, +300 or -220, or even how to play craps—but if I mention the stock market, it’s always either, “No” or “I have it in a mutual fund” or “I leave that to my 401K.”
The same people who gladly spend half an hour a day in the fall tracking their fantasy team(s) in a league where first prize will earn you $500 are scared off by, or uninterested in, the prospects of making themselves “a 36-bagger” as our Faithful Reader has with her Amazon stock.
It would be nice if everyone was given a rudimentary education in the stock market in high school. The basics aren’t hard to understand at all. The first step in making the field of play more even is to demystify the way the top 5% remain the top 5%.
Learned an interesting fact yesterday that we thought we’d share. Only 4% of men in America are 6’2″ or taller. And yet 36% of American CEOs are 6’2″ or taller.
I’ll never forget a very intelligent and decent man I worked with at SI, who was closer to 5’6″, telling me, “If I were six-feet tall, I’d be running this place.” And he should have. By the way, when I was there are managing editors (de facto CEOs of the editorial side) were 6’4″ and 6’2″.
Musician and songwriting legend John Prine is, as of this writing, in critical condition due to COVID-19. Here’s a clip from three years ago of he and Stephen Colbert performing “That’s The Way The World Goes ‘Round.” Best wishes to Prine, 73, that he can beat it.