by John Walters

Last night No. 15 Coastal Carolina whipped Arkansas State in Jonesboro, 52-20, to improve to 6-0. The Chanticleers already had the lowest MH number (Scoring Defense ranking + Scoring Offense ranking… the lower the number, the better the team) in the nation before last night’s game.

Tonight Cincinnati, fresh off last Saturday’s win at Notre Dame, hosts Temple. The Bearcats are 4-0 and ranked No. 5 in the nation. They’re garnering way more love on national sports radio to break the four-team playoff glass ceiling than Coastal is.

Let’s jump to the future and assume (a large assumption, albeit) that both Group of Five schools remain unbeaten the rest of the way. In December each would play in its conference championship game (the Sun Belt and the American Athletic, respectively) against a foe that may not be ranked.

And we have not even broached the topic of G5 unbeatens UTSA, SMU (who’ll play Cincy) and BYU (who won’t have a conference game). In short, those conference title games will not move the needle much for Coastal or Cincy as far as the selection committee is concerned.

We have a better idea.

The Gangsta Bowl

Before we share this latest lame-brained idea, a point of agreement: there are no steadfast rules in college football. You cannot blow up the BCS! Until you do. Oklahoma and Texas can’t just secede to the SEC! Until they do. Players cannot transfer without sitting out a year! Until they can. Or be paid for their name, image and likeness! Until D.J. Uiagalelei shows up in a Fansville ad. BYU and Coastal Carolina just cannot schedule a game in the middle of a season! Until they did.

Anarchy is okay in college football. As long as someone is getting paid. Paging Dr. Weknowdis.

Thus, we present the Group of 5 Bowl, or Gangsta Bowl (Nuthin’ But A G Thang). If, after 12 games, two Group of 5 schools (e.g., Cincinnati and Coastal Carolina) are still undefeated, do not waste their and everyone else’s time with conference championship games that will do little to improve either school’s Playoff stock. Instead, in the words of Dennis Green, “crown their ass” in terms of conference titles and arrange for them to play in the Gangsta Bowl. 

The Gangsta Bowl would draw more viewers than the two conference championship games combined. The Gangsta Bowl would put a better “W” on the victorious team’s resume—and compel the selection committee to deal with it. The Gangsta Bowl would elevate all Group of 5 programs because it would enhance the chances of the winning side making the playoff.

You wanna chirp at the selection committee and Power 5 programs for maintaining a glass ceiling? Fine. But here’s an idea that would challenge Group of 5 conferences to obliterate their own self-imposed glass ceiling. 

The Gangsta Bowl. Ready to make an entrance, so back on up/Cuz you know we’re ‘bout to rip sh*t up.


One thought on “THE GANGSTA BOWL

  1. You made your glorious return to suggest something so pie-in-the-sky that will never happen … and I loved every word.

    I’d say “Welcome back!,” but I have a hunch this was just a one-off, quick-hitter and that you’re not really “back.”

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