by John Walters
1. Permanent Waves
What’s Rule No. 1? You know what it is. Rule No. 1: Gravity always wins. So yesterday or a few days earlier physicists explained that they were able to sense gravitational waves from, I believe, the collision of two black holes a billion
or so years ago light years away(Yeah, like one of us is going to disprove that within the next news cycle; Hey, I actually took Physics in college and aced it, unlike every other sportswriter you know; I don’t wanna hear your guff!), which props up Albert Einsteins’ Theory of Relativity.
I can picture Albert Einstein staring back from the infinite morass, saying, “It ain’t rocket science, boys. I ain’t no dummy.” Anyway, a bunch of mortal physicists validating Einstein’s work is like Jesse Pinkman looking at Mr. White and complimenting him on the purity of that last batch.
2. Catch It Like Beckham?
Until yesterday I would have thought that Eli Manning was the only New York Giant with an NFL-caliber relative. And then I was watching local news report on Terron Beckham, who is built like a brick ship house.
Interesting story (and I imagine there’s more beneath the surface). Terron is 23 and never played college football. But on the WCBS report I saw, they said that the 5’11”, 220-pound fitness trainer bench-pressed 225 pounds 42 times and had a standing vertical of 45″. The first number would be better than any running back last year at the NFL Combine and the second would tie the record. Terron is headed to the Combine next week and he’ll be a big story.
3. “Bruuuuuuuuuce!” “Booooooooooooook!”
They’re not booing, they’re saying, “Autobiography!”
“Sprung from pages out on Highway nine…” is how I’d open the tome, but I shouldn’t tell my fellow Monmouth County native how to write. Bruce Springsteen has been working on his autobiography for seven years (well, actually, if you listen to his lyrics, he’s been working on it since Greetings From Asbury Park) and now we know it will be released on September 27.
I’m looking forward to the book tour. “I saw Bruce at the Rochester Barnes & Noble! He read for three hours, then he came back and read for 40 more minutes!”
Comic Matt Goldich: “I hope this Springsteen book finally reveals whether or not he is from New Jersey.”
4. He Was A Day Tripper (Even If It Occurred at Night)
Haven’t we all daydreamed about doing this? A euphonium (I don’t know, either) player in the Scots Guard, Lance Sergeant Matt Lawson was on an early Valentine’s Day date with his wife when he heard shouts of “Stop! Police!” Lawson saw the 17 year-old assailant headed his way when at the last moment, he stuck out his right leg and tripped him. It was beautiful. Lawson, 37, should be signed by Sunderland later this week.
5. Hawaii 19-3 (Which Is Not, Percentage-Wise, Superior to 5-0, But They’ll Take It)
I was all set to do this item on how the three East Bay teams–Golden State, Cal, and ST. Mary’s—are undefeated at home last night after Cal easily handled No. 11 Oregon 83-63. That put their combined home mark at 54-0. I went to bed and of course the Gaels lost at home to unranked Pepperdine, 69-63, to sully the unbeaten streak.
Then I looked farther west, to Honolulu. Do you realize that Hawaii is 19-3 and that one of the Rainbow Warriors’ three losses is to Oklahoma? Last night Hawaii ravaged UC-Irvine, the second-best team in its conference, the Big West, 74-52. Coincidentally, their leading scorer last night with 23 points was Roderick Bobbitt, who is from the East Bay (Oakland).
In case you were wondering, the Rainbow Warriors have been to the NCAA Tournament four times (2002, 2001, 1994, 1972) but have yet to win a game.
Shout It Out Loud
I’m just a foot soldier in the KISS ARMY, but this is one of my favorite songs from the band. Both Paul and Gene get vocals, and it has a typical anthemic mantra. KISS is never trying to rewrite “Bohemian Rhapsody,” which I love about them. KISS’s second-ever single, it reached No. 31 in the USA but climbed all the way to No. 1 in Canada. This has long been one of the most oft-played songs on KISS tours, and why not?
8 p.m. TCM
History of the Eagles, Parts I & II
8 p.m. CNN
NBA All-Star Game
8:30 p.m. TBS
What the hell, NBA? 8:30 p.m tip-off on a school night? You really don’t care, do you? Listen, if you have not seen Casablanca, like, ever, do yourself a favor and watch it. A witty script, a suspenseful love story, Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman and Nazis! Also, flip back and forth to watch the love-hate fest that was the Eagles. It’s a good night to hunker down with the clicker.
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